


Welcome to the Blue House

by Olor_et_Luna



Category: Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015)
Genre: Angst, Anxiety Attacks, But also some really joyous and great stuff, Eventual Smut, Fluff, Gratuitous children's programming references, Kid Fic, M/M, Not Michelle Friendly, PTSD, Past Child Abuse, Recovery, emotional abuse and neglect of a child, knock knock who's there alive Harry, little old women making dire threats, there is some dark subject matter being addressed here, what even am i doing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-04
Updated: 2017-08-08
Packaged: 2018-05-24 14:45:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 33,992
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6157033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Olor_et_Luna/pseuds/Olor_et_Luna
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ultimately, this is the story of how The Goodbye Song became something that every Kingsman knew...and hummed on missions, how bad childhoods can make good ones, and a reminder that if a three year old wants to play pattycake, you stop what you are doing to play with her.</p><p>Also how Merlin and Eggsy finally hooked up.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Shhhhh...

**Author's Note:**

> I make no promises as to the regularity of updates, only that this will be updated until it's complete. I also make no promises as to finished size- it may be part of a longer series, or just have some ridiculous number of chapters. I don't even promise that it doesn't suck.  
> I do, however, promise that it will not be abandoned. I will do my level best to tag for things that I know could be triggering if/when they crop up. As much as this will be silly and lighthearted in places,mint will be dark in others.
> 
> As of current, (early evening March third) this is neither beta'd nor Britpicked, and for that, all errors are solely on me.
> 
> This first chapter is almost entirely dialogue, a different style than much of the rest of the story. Also, I posted from my tablet, which is a new experience. Sorry.
> 
> If you are still reading thus far....
> 
> Welcome to the places my head goes to in the wee hours of the morning when I can't get back to sleep...hope y'all don't mind me moving into the tiny hamlet town of Merwin.

“Merlin, I don't know what to do.”

“Eggsy? Lad, what is it? What has ye calling me, _at home_ , at five in the morn...are ye alright?” 

Eggsy sighed, dragged his hand down his face. He was pretty sure he could hear Merlin knocking stuff around on a bedside table. “I am so sorry, so fuckin’ sorry. I didn't mean to wake you up, I just, I wasn't thinking and I haven't had anything like this happen before and I just don't know, I don't know what else to do and you're the only one I thought of and just…”

“Boyo, I need you to breathe, and tell me if you're okay, otherwise I'm assuming the worst and dispatching help to your flat.”

“Mum went and asked me to watch Daisy overnight so she could go out with the girls, and I've been missing the mouse, so of course I said yeah, dint I? I hardly get to spend any time with her. That was Thursday.”

“It's Wednesday.”

“I know that. That's the problem. We've got a meeting at 7:30, yeah? And I don't have any information for a sitter or a nanny or nothin’ like that, and even if I did, I'm not gonna tell them that mum left her with me almost a week now, and don't you dare suggest I just use the glasses in front of her, I'd rather take her with me than have her see me talking to myself for a few hours.” 

“I repeat, it. is. Wednesday.” Merlin’s teeth snapped between the words, “Overnight implies one night, Eggsy, and it's been almost a week. You said this hasn't happened before, so again, is everything alright?”

Eggsy slid down against the wall. “Mostly? I **should** be more worried about where she is, I suppose, but I'm just happy that Dais is with me. I can't say this is the first time she's disappeared like, just that it's the first time since I've not been living there, or that I've known ‘bout, leastways. I'd rather watch Daisy than risk _him_ seeing her, and I can't control what mum does, or with who, but I can keep Dais safe, right?  
I just, if I call a service they'll ask questions I can't answer, and if I call someone from the old neighborhood, what if Dean finds out, and just...I didn't put myself through this shite to let my girl down, so tell me what I'm supposed to do. _You're magic,_ y’know? I have a problem, I need something, and you make it better, find a way to fix it, yeah? You gotta know by now you always do that, so please, Merlin, please, I'm begging, what do I do?” 

“How old, exactly, is she?” Merlin quietly asked.

“I dunno, for certain, she was really different when me da was still around, from what I hear, so I think she was about-”

“How old is Daisy, not Michelle. Michelle's not my primary concern at the moment.”

“Right, right, she just turned three a month ago. I thought you know everything about us? Had it all in your database and ready to go on your tablet.” Eggsy smirked a little, felt a bit more like hisself than he had since Sunday when he realized that maybe, this time, Michelle wasn't gonna waltz back like nothing was wrong.

“Boyo, my tablet doesn’t come ta bed with me now, does it? Bring her in. When we get off the phone, I'll ring Andrew, let him know to expect you'll have a...visitor...with you. We can ask the appropriate staff to make some preparations. Does she have any allergies or preferences food wise? Any special things on the telly she adores or she's not allowed? It cannae be an everyday solution but it'll work until we get something else planned, I know there are other agents with children their own.”

“Naw, she's not picky or nothing, eats whatever I cook up for her but make sure it's got fruits and veg, cause mum ain't good at that. She doesn't like them princess shows and iffen ye think they can find it, she adores Bear in the Big Blue House and I only have like, two DVDs of it, and they're ancient and driving me bonkers, but I can bring ‘em. She likes the shows and movies I grew up wif, and builder and brain and moving type shows, cause that's what I've got here, and what I left at mums and I'm not painting a good picture here.”

Merlin sighed, again. “We will discuss that when you are here. I assume you've got a seat and all? I mean, you've been with her almost a week, Michelle didn't leave you totally high and dry?”

“Wouldn't matter, hold on a sec, yeah? Gonna pop you on speaker, while I get my girlie up. She won't worry none hearing me talk seeing a phone on my belt, it's not like the glasses would be….there we are, wake up Darlin, we have an adventure to go on today! There's gonna be new people and a train, and ye get to see Miss Roxy again, you haven't seen her in ages! Won't that be exciting?  
Now Mouse! That isn't the-  
DamImeanDangit! Daisy! No need to bite! We're going to go to a very big house, don't ye want that?  
No, don't...I know, mornings are hard, love, just get up enough to get in some clean jammers, okay?  
Sorry about that, Merlin. I've got my own seat, stroller, cot, all that. She's got her own room here, even, so that's not the issue, it's just that...M-I-C...well, you know who up and you know what….or well. I suppose we don't know what, that's the problem.”

“I know,” Merlin spoke softly, “I have a suddenly very busy, very exciting morning and still a big meeting to ready. I'll see you both once you're here. Goodbye Eggsy, and Goodbye Miss Daisy, I look forward to meeting you.”


	2. Hello, from a small Mouse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Look-he is tired, he is under caffeinated, and he is cranky. He is not to be blamed for any of this...any. of. this.
> 
> Also, that intern from accounting totally has it coming to them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I cannot say I'm totally in love with the pacing and tone of this chapter, but they are, and that's what stands. I need to emphasize and remind that if you think Michelle is a good mother, this may not be your preferred reading materials. Not beta, not Britpicked, open to volunteers for either as my normal pool just won't work for beta on this and are all from the states....

To say that Merlin stormed into the Kingsman manor would be overly dramatic, entirely accurate, but dramatic nonetheless. To be fair, he did park diagonally in the turnabout, burst through the heavy double doors and start yelling about child safety locks on the liquor cabinets, needing access to all the CCTV cameras in and around Eggsy, Michelle and Dean’s neighborhoods for the last week, at a minimum and demanding that someone, _anyone_ , **everyone** , get as many episodes of _Bear in the Big Blue House_ and _Imagination Movers_ as they could get their hands on.

Percival will swear til his deathbed that while walking down the main corridor he overheard Merlin threaten to cut the accounting intern who asked about _The Wiggles._ There may have been a knife in his hand, it may even have disappeared right up the sleeve of that ridiculously soft sweater before anyone but the intern could look too closely.

Amelia claims he offered to let her out of the next three training trials if she would be willing to make a spreadsheet of every employee that has minor children - cross referencing what they do for childcare, compiling background checks on any hired childcare services as well as ‘satisfaction scores’ and then ranking them based on her perceived suitability for a three year old ‘suspected tomboy’. She really hates making spreadsheets, but not nearly as much as fake drowning.

Warnings were being whispered up and down the corridors, sent over instant messenger and text, and people were made ready. As Merlin entered the conference room, the door snapped shut behind him.

“What the hell is going on? You've got half the Manor wondering if this is some sort of demented drill, the other half traumatized, and delegates from both keep interrupting as we attempt to set breakfast service for the meeting to ask things like where they should put the _very small chair_!” Harry snapped.

“He's right, you've never been the bellowing orders and stomping around sort,” Roxy stated as she set some coffee in front of Harry before taking a seat and motioning for Merlin to follow suit, “you're more the sternly stating orders expecting them to be followed because we already fear you, sort. So all we know is Andrew notified us that Eggsy will have ‘a rather small child with, to his understanding’ and now you've gone bonkers. Also, and I really debated bringing this up, but you came in without shaving. You're all...stubbly all over.” This accompanied with big eyes and a vague hand wave encompassing her entire face and head.

Merlin sat, veritably sagging into his chair. He stared at his mug, watching the tea steep and finally organizing his thoughts. “Lass, you know Daisy, right?”

“Of course! I've been round the park with her a few times with Eggsy, few other times he's had her at his when I've gone over to decompress after a mission or a bad date. Darling, interesting girl, why?”

“You ever meet Michelle then?”

When Roxy just shook her head after thinking about it, Merlin shot his gaze towards Harry and cocked an eyebrow, “And what about you, fearless leader? I know you would've told me iffen you spent any time with the tyke, but what about Michelle. I don't recall Lee ever talking about her in my interactions with him but you were closer, you care to explain to me _what the ever loving **fuck causes a woman to abandon her children repeatedly?**_ Because I'm afraid I can't quite wrap my rather formidable brain around it right now. I'm still trying to parse young Eggsy waking me up at the ass crack o’dawn, in a panic because he didn't know what to do about his sister that he was watching nigh on a week.  
Because Michelle dropped her off for a night.  
One. Singular. Thursday night to be precise.” 

“But, it's Wednesday." Harry stated.

Merlin stood, drained his mug and slammed it back down, rounding on Harry. “So tell me, _Arthur_ , I want to understand before he gets here. What I was able to glean in the scant research I did between him waking me up and now, is that after Lee died, she was fairly explicit in that she wanted us to have **no** involvement in her life,in wee Gary’s life at all. I've no idea how he held onto the medal long as he did…”

“Before Lee died, she wanted us to have no involvement anyways.”

“She is a petty, _awful, **self centered**_ woman, and this isn't the first time she's left a child essentially unattended. And while I understand _Galahad_ staying out of the situation, especially under the old watch, what I don't understand is why in hell wouldn't you, Harry, have manned the fuck up and gotten that wee lass away?” Merlin was in front of him, glasses off and clenched in one fist.

“Honestly? I didn't even think about it.” Harry quietly spoke. “I had hoped that maybe, just maybe, having madness descend around her would make her value something sweet and pure and innocent. I've been dealing with helping put the world back together, Murray, and Eggsy never said anything to make me question my assumption she had changed. Maybe it was remiss of me.

I won't discuss Lee’s relationship with her in front of Roxy without Eggsy’s okay, regardless of Roxy’s position. I won't discuss it with anyone without Eggsy’s okay unless it is for his own safety, not even you, though it seems you researched your way into the answers you needed, as always.”

“I've still got a question, well...two now.” Roxy spoke up around the rim of her mug, “For those who don't speak fluent Angry Old Man, what exactly is going on? And second, Murray? Really?”

“Murray is a good name, name like that belongs to a man knows how to put someone in their place, lookit up, ya don't believe me.” Merlin growled. “Eggsy called me this morning, on the home phone at five or so. Had himself in a right state, his...Michelle dropped the wee lass off late last week, he's had her since. It's why he hasn't been in. I had Elspeth in resources check and he used personal days Friday, Monday and Tuesday. I looked deeper, he uses a personal day every other week or so, never right after missions unless he's forced, no, our boyo’s been banking those. I'm willing to place money on his personal days matching his days with Daisy though. 

Michelle hasn't been heard from since she dropped Daisy off. Poor Eggsy wouldn't have reached out except the meeting today. He wasn't willing to use the glasses in front of her, afraid it would be upsetting, but worried what we'd do if he didn't show up at the table. Before either of ye ask, he didn't call around for a sitter or nanny or any other sort of minder because he had no clue how to explain the sudden appearance of his sister, without his mum having provided for things like adequate day care or _any_ basic fucking necessity.

Now, I am expecting the delivery of a _wee teeny table_ to go with the _very small chair_ that was dropped off earlier, as well as some cut up fruits, cocoa, very small scones, and someone will be wheeling the SmartScreen in from my office. The little miss seems to like some smart sounding telly, and I'm hoping it'll occupy her while we do what we must.”

“Sir, you cannot be meaning that she'll stay-”

“That is exactly what I mean, Lancelot! You did not hear him this morning. You are not the person he trusted when his world was falling apart. That was me, and I am telling you that his sister being near him right now is important, his sister being happy is important, and if you have a problem, you know exactly what to do. Now, I believe unless either of you had anything else, there's a meeting to finish setting up."

“Sorry, Merlin. Of course.” Roxy murmured as she rose and turned to open the door, neatly sidestepping the general staff waiting to bring in everything Merlin had just stated, as well as Amelia, who handed him a bundle of thick, multicolored folders. 

The repeated, loud, squeaking that only comes from Eggsy's trainers on polished floors drew everyone's attention back into the hallway to witness Eggsy chasing a high speed, shrieking, pink and yellow blur.

“C’mon, ‘member what we talked about all in the car and the train, and when you met nice Mister Andrew and he pulled a lolly from behind yer flopsy big ear? You're to be quiet, y’are, and no running? Come on Daisy, girly, listen to me, please, nooooooo, why?”

There were quite a few cleared throats to cover laughter, bit lips to hide smiles and a few outright stunned expressions. Roxy swiveled between Harry and Merlin wondering who would deal with this..situation. She was familiar with Daisy, but couldn't say she'd ever seen the girl run from her brother like that, not even when they were playing.

“Excuse me, but were ye supposed to be running in here, little one, or making a racket?” Merlin stepped forward and finally spoke, clear and firm, but only loud enough to carry, and not harshly. The shrieking blur stopped, very suddenly. It was indeed a small, blond girl wearing pink footy pajamas with a tail and hood. Large green eyes stared from under floppy mouse ears attached to the soft looking hood, all the way up, up, up further still unflinchingly and unabashedly, at Merlin.

“Ello. You are **tall**.” 

Merlin handed his pile of folders back off to Amelia and crouched down as close to Daisy’s level as he could comfortably get, looking her square in the eyes. “I am, at that. I’m Mister Merlin, and you, Miss, are very small indeed. Now, looking at ye, I think I better ask, today, are you a DaisyGirl, or a DaisyMouse?”

“‘m a mouse! See, ears and tail and I can flip down paws, looks!” Daisy pointed excitedly to each ear and her tail before folding over one cuff of her sleeve and proudly showing off the obviously hand stitched paw prints then flipping it back. Had anyone cared to look, they would have noticed an interesting blend of terrified, embarrassed, relieved and utterly besotted on Eggsy's face.

“Okay, Mouse, and ye know the rules?” Merlin paused while Daisy solemnly nodded. “So you know that running for no reason, yelling for no reason, and not listening to your adult was following the rules or against them?”

“‘gainst.” She replied, still maintaining eye contact but starting to pooch out her lower lip and twist her fingers together. Eggsy started to step forward but Merlin held his hand up to stop him.

“So, what do you think you should do, now?”

“I’m so sorry, Mister Merlin, that ‘m bad.” Daisy looked down now, folding both ‘paws’ over her hands and letting her ears flop over her face, breath coming in huge, shuddering gasps.

“No no no, lass. _ **You are not bad.**_ Look at me now, you can keep your hands hiding, but show me those beautiful green eyes again, there you are.” Merlin gently wiped across her cheeks with his thumbs, “I need you to listen. Your behavior was naughty, but you are not bad. I believe you are a very good girl, and a very good mouse, and I don't want to hear anyone, _including_ you, say you are bad. You misbehaved, you did bad, but you. are. not. bad. Now, is there anything else you need to say?”

Daisy sniffled and blinked, rubbing her 'paws' together, “Can I touch your head?”

“After you apologize to Eggsy for not listening to him, Mouse, and then you can quickly meet people before we have to work, okay?”He waited for her to nod, before standing to stretch and look around, marveling at how obviously everyone else was attempting to suddenly look very busy.


	3. Reach High, Think Big

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There is some hand waving, some exposition, some explanations, and some hits directly to the feels.
> 
> The accounting intern has it coming...still.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, all mistake belong to me, not beta, not Britpicked, you know the drill on that one. 
> 
> I've been writing for a while, and this is the first story where my narrator's voice has wanted to change so drastically based on who the focal of the writing was at the time. If it's something that's problematic for y'all let me know and I'll see if they'll let me reign it in any. 
> 
> I am so humbled by the responses this has been getting. I've updated the tags, not necessarily for anything in this chapter but still...

Eggsy sat back in his seat, truly appreciating the view, not for the first time but with a new eye. At one end of the table sat Harry, Roxy and Merlin flanking him. When Roxy, Eggsy and Merlin returned from Valentine’s bunker, they expected to find many things, but none of them thought to see Harry, bandages over half his head and face, directing on-site agents in clean up and aide efforts. Merlin spoke with the doctors, decided whatever answers they gave him to explain why a dead man was not only alive, but functionally walking and talking were sufficient, then set about designing a prosthetic eye that essentially replaced the glasses in their functionality. 

Seating Harry as the next Arthur was a no-brainer as far as the surviving Knights were concerned. Arthur's first official piece of business was asking Lancelot to sit at his right hand, figuratively and literally. It was Eggsy’s understanding from his long conversations with Roxy that if she wasn't on a mission, she was functioning as the scariest administrative assistant in the world. He likens it to being a good guy version of Gazelle. Rox confided she would've been offended if it weren't fascinating, if she hadn't quite literally saved Harry from multiple assassination attempts already, and on top of that it was saving her from helping with training trials or routine ops, or whatever else ‘you mere mortals do’ during downtime. Eggsy generally did, well, training trials yeah, but also helped with plotting ‘nontrad evac channels’ and then someone mentioned he had a really good eye when it came to pattern recognition and threat avoidance and rapid de-escalation techniques,so like, he was trying to help teach the others how to spot if someone was acting’ in a way that meant they was about to blow their lid at ye, and how to either get the hell out, or get them to not beat on ya. Merlin always looked really somewhere between sad and angry and tired when they talked about it, but then Eggsy thought that when they were at work around other people, and he wasn't shooting something or blowing something up or the like, because then his entire face was just gleeful, that Merlin looked angry and tired anyways.

Way down at the other end of the table is Percival, Geraint and Gareth,who will almost certainly have to be separated at some point. Eggsy often wonders why he ever worried how the prim and proper group would accept him. He knows it's largely due to Chester, and the gits he was in trials with, but to watch Perci and Gareth get into slap fights over Gareth ‘eyeing Roxy’ or or Perci snatching the last cake, or Perci starting another round of ‘Geraint more like Ger-won’t’ and then Gareth will be all ‘Gerisnt’, he's pretty certain Geraint made a your mom joke to Gareth the other week, and just...no, around those three Eggsy feels the best bred Gentleman there ever was.

No one ever sits next to Eggsy very long if they can avoid it. The spots will be filled with a revolving group of remote knights and support staff, as needed. No one wants to deal with the way he fidgets and sprawls if he isn't actively on mission, the way he sulks and pouts until he's praised when a mission was successful. No one quite knows what to do with him when he makes himself so very small and still and quiet, almost a shadow against the back of his seat, when a mission goes poorly. Eggsy doesn't talk about it, can he pass you anything?

The rest of the table is taken up with file folders and touch screens, snacks and supplies, a grab bag of wants and needs for a variety of endeavors and temperaments. Other than minor foot traffic, there's really nothing that ever obstructs his view of anyone at the table, or of the space directly across from it that has a few wingback chairs, side tables, book shelves, and currently Merlin's SmartScreen, a table and chair that could only be described as _dainty_ a small pile of blankets and pillows, a velveteen rabbit (of course), and a _very large plush Bear._ Where someone found that, let alone on very short notice, Eggsy may never know but will forever be grateful. Because right this moment, while Gabriel, that goddamned annoying accounting intern who cannot take a hint and keeps asking him out, he told Merlin the other night that he was afraid if Gabriel didn't take the hint soon he'd have to talk to Elspeth about it, and Elspeth scared the shit out of Eggsy, alright? Anyways, while Gabriel was droning on and on and on about the potential financial liability of having an ‘unsupervised minor on manor grounds’ when he was supposed to be talking about the new training track idea, said _highly supervised thank you very much_ Daisy was sitting on the belly of Bear, pretending to watch her show, but every now and then her eyes would meet Eggsy’s from ‘round the edge of her hood, and either dart quickly towards Merlin with a slight nod, or slide toward Gabriel and narrow. Maybe instead of going to Elspeth he would just take Merlin up on his offer to ‘handle it’, and try not to think about what _that_ entails. 

Hopefully, Daisy'll either nod off or get involved in a show before actual business is discussed. That girl is Eggsy’s _raison d’etre,_ the center of his universe, and he doesn't need her overhearing anything that might worry her. He assumed, when Merlin said to bring her with, that he'd assign someone to mind her in an out of the way office, or he'd have found a sitter or someone's nanny to borrow for the day, not this, never this. Not keeping her right where he can see that she's safe, she's not being hurt or ignored or spoken to wrong, no one is saying something on accident that makes her scared or panicked. How do you even go about repaying kindness like this? Time and again it's been made clear to Eggsy that no one at or involved with the Kingsman expects anything from him other than that he do his best effort, train hard, watch his team's backs, help keep people safe, and it is such an _alien_ sensation, and he's not entirely certain it isn't a set up and there isn't someone waiting to take it all away as soon as he fucks up badly enough, take Daisy away, but he thinks he is okay, for right now. And he can't be small, not around her, **never** around her. If he is there, he needs to be in front of her, taking it all, keeping it from her. An impenetrable wall of Big Brother who won't let anyone harm her, in any way. Every look, every word, every touch, every last fucking _intention_ for all he cares will be put through the finest Eggsy filter until nothing but good touches his Mouse, even when it makes it _so fucking hard_ to breathe or-

“Mordred?Your thoughts on the matter?” 

“Of course, Arthur. Now, I don't claim to be educated at accountin’ like Gabriel here, so I thought to just ask Mark, that's the accounting lead, then Sacha, they're in charge of the grounds, I don't know if you know them Gabriel?And to be sure I had Amelia’s team pull some aerials of the last few area that we had major runs in, so we could all see what we’re working with here, yeah?” Eggsy grabbed a tablet and started to load the image files, saying a small prayer of thanks he was ready for the meeting. Adding another tally in the list of things he owes Merlin for. Glancing over quickly it looks like Daisy finally passed out, the SmartScreen is color cycling in the wave pattern Merlin likes to use as ‘visual background noise’, a slide past Merlin shows the man checking on Daisy himself with a soft smile, not looking sad or tired or angry at all...oh...my.

“So yeah, my idea is ‘stead of building a parkour course here, which would have to be altered regularly, moreso than the obstacle course, if we're being honest, to keep it challenging and effective as a training and practice tool, we go out and use any number of abandoned or under construction buildings if we want there to be no human interaction, or find anywhere that suits our needs, really. It's not like we are the only people out there, it just means we don't do it in obvious plaids and pinstripes we don't want to be noticed. Mark said we can get insurance waivers with a lot of the building companies, especially in areas that are still being rebuilt, and Sacha said they just don't have the manpower to build a suitable course here, the cost of running background checks to hire that much staff, not to mention the amount of the grounds it'd use-”

“Beg pardon, Gary-”

“Eggsy. Eggsy or Mordred please, Gabriel. I've told you afore.” Eggsy crossed his left foot over the back of his right, and started bouncing his right leg under the table.

“Whatever, your Sacha, he said-”

“They.”

“Pardon?”

“Sacha is a they. Not a him, not a her. They, them, their, they said, their people, you will refer to them thusly, aight, Gabe?” Eggsy started to pull his hands into the sleeves of his shirt, stopped when he remembered he was supposed to be presenting his case in regards to the parkour training, it's the only reason he's even here today. He took a deep breath and continued, “If you really look at what we are dealing with real world when these sorts of escape are needed, and take into account that most of ye have military training, yeah, but not gymnastics and dance like Rox and I, figure most of the new recruits ye bring in are gonna be more of the same as you lot, really good at regimented, really good at formal, can improvise at the opera or ball, but shite in my old neighborhood, well we need better training on this. I'm done with having to field dress broken bones because someone was too uppity to listen to the pleb who's proven himself time and again about how to jump from a fire escape up to a drain pipe! I'm willin’ to teach the ones willin’ to learn from me, but ye have to allow me what I need.”

Eggsy cycled through the photos showing that the evacuation routes that led to injury were unavoidable, unsecured in advance by necessity, and nontraditional, but always navigable by the majority of the team involved each time. What he didn't point out, but was noticed by anyone who read the reports, was that he put himself at great risk in each case to get the injured party back home. He then would disappear into his chair during mission debriefing, where no one would sit beside him because he made himself invisible. He would never acknowledge the grateful thanks he received for bringing another person home safe, because they were broken because _he_ didn't teach them enough, didn't do enough, allowed them to be noticed.

“So, here's a sample of some of the areas I was thinking we could run in, I know that there's regular free runner traffic in all of them already, so the only thing that would maybe stand out is you ages. So like, Perci and Geraint, no offense but you two are getting old, right? And that may raise a few eyebrows, but again as long as you're in a vest and shorts, or trackies you should be fine, yeah, you'll be needin’ a few runs when you're all bespoke, but not every day, not regularly. Think you can offend your sensibilities that long?”

“If the powers that be can, we can. I'll have you know that Merlin routinely walks around his house in trackies and slippers when he's not working.” Gareth piped up, smirking. Eggsy dropped his tablet.

“How would ye even know that, you sniveling piece of-” Merlin was snarling.

“Merlin, settle lest you wake our guest with some untoward language,” Harry cautioned, “and if I recall, Gareth’s round of recruits had a challenge to see who could nab one of your coffee mugs, specifically. 'Not a teacup, but a coffee mug', and Gareth had the bright idea of trying to sneak into your house. You broke three ribs and stabbed him in the thigh. I still don't know where you were hiding the knife.”

“Ohhh, that was you then, lad! Well heck, I've never apologized for that,” Eggsy watched as Merlin went from smiling to stone faced, “and I won't, because it's good to remember, fer _anyone,_ that to mess about with things that I consider mine means yer like to get a knife somewhere unexpected, ye ken what I mean?” 

There was a dull thump as a chair fell over onto the carpet, and Gabriel jumped up, “I'll just go run these recommendations down to….the final copies I mean, since you called...I'm going now.” 

Percival watched Gabriel leave, looked at Gareth, pointedly between Merlin and Eggsy a few times, then burst out laughing, “Oh, Murray, really now? This is excellent!”

“Don't think I won't shiv you during your afternoon nap in the garden, Elliot.”

“Merlin, please don't threaten to shiv Percival in front of my sister, even when she's sleeping. Now can anyone explain why Gabriel just ran away and what Perc thinks is so funny?” Eggsy asked.

“‘Scuse me? Not sleeping no more. Whycome so many of you have two names? Is it like how ‘m Daisy an sometimes Mouse, but still Daisy?” Eggsy turned, along with everyone else, to see the top half of a face and a riotous shock of blond curls sticking up over the unused edge of the table.

“Why, yes clever girl!” Said Harry.

“Your face got hurt, how?” Eggsy knew his sister enough to know Harry needed to be honest, did his best to convey that with a look, hoped Merlin and Roxy somehow telepathically told him. 

“Well, little Mouse, a very bad man made me hurt some people. When I told him that I refused to let him do that to others, he hurt me very badly. It wasn't as bad as we thought, but I'll have scars, the marks you see, and Merlin made me a special new eye, sometimes I can't use all of one side of my body correctly, so Miss Roxy helps me.” 

Daisy walked over to Harry and held her hand towards his face, then stopped. “Can I?” 

“Can I lift you up then?” Harry asked her. Daisy and Eggsy both nodded, so Harry scooped her gently up and set her on the arm of the chair, hovering his own arm awkwardly behind her.

“Oh for Pete’s sake, Ladybug, I'm going to hold on to you so you don't fall, Mister Harry is afraid of doing something to hurt you, scare you, or make your brother angry, okay?” Roxy said as she wrapped her arm around Daisy.

Daisy reached up and gently traced the webbing of scars and divots that ran from Harry's forehead, across his eye and cheek and under his ear. “Kay, Miss LadyRocks. Mister Harry, does it still hurt? It doesn't when I touch, right? What about the bad man?”

“Well...sometimes it hurts, and sometimes parts of me that aren't there anymore hurt, and I can tell when the weather is going to change, but it doesn't hurt when you touch, you are so gentle! And sometimes it doesn't hurt at all, but I have to be careful or I'll set my hand on something hot, and I won't notice right away, or I'll get a paper cut and make a mess of thing...As for the very bad man, Miss Roxy, Mister Merlin and your dear Eggsy made very sure he wouldn't be able to hurt anyone else.”

“Eggsy is good at taking hurt so you don't have to, he's the best brother Mister Harry, you know that, right?”

“Yes, darling girl. I think I'm seeing that.”

“Do you want to hold my Rabbit for a while?”

“Uhm...that's...thank you, but maybe later?”

Daisy squinched around until she was facing Roxy more than Harry. “Miss LadyRocks?”

“Yes, Miss LadyBug?” Roxy replied in her best serious business face and voice.

“The very bad man, he didn't?”

“Oh, babygirl, no. Not at all. I was very far away doing things to make sure he couldn't hurt a whole bunch of people, Merlin and Eggsy were the ones who dealt with him directly, I was never going to be anywhere near...oh!”

“DaisyGirl,cmon Mouse, let's go queue up some _Imagination Movers_ for you, yeah? Let us get back to it and we can get questions asked later, please luvvie?” Eggsy started up from his chair, hands shaking a little. Percival slowly came around where he could be seen and eased him back down with a soft sussing hush.

“But lunch? And first? Mister Merlin, can you brush my hairs, I bet you miss it, having hair? Your prickly pear head is awful nice to touch but mines all soft like.”

“I...I can do that, lass, braid it up pretty, too, iffen you'd like, climb right up on the table in front of me, I'm sure someone can fetch what we need and we do need lunch, too. Any other questions before we get started?”

“Uh-huh,but I don't want to get in trouble.”

“It's okay, just ask.” Merlin coached. Eggsy looked at her and mouthed ‘it is okay’.

“So whys you have so many knifes in yer boots and sweater and spenderers and things?”

“And tell him why you'd ask that, please.” Eggsy coached.

“Cause you can see them, just have to look a lil different to is all.”

“And what about Mister Percival?” Merlin asked. Daisy looked to Eggsy again for his okay to answer.

“His stick isn't right for walkin, an e’r’bodies who was here today gots guns but Mister Merlin and Mister Harry.”

“No, Mouse, that cannae be right because the accounting intern isn't supposed to be carrying a gun.” Merlin said. Daisy looked at Eggsy, obviously confused.

“He meant Gabriel, Dais.” Eggsy supplied.

“Yea, that one, he's mean, and he has a gun like _him_ , Eggsy.” 

“Well shi-oot. Someone may want to go and collect Mean Gabe, get his snub nose 38, with how she recognized it it'll be in his waistband, find out where he got it, and, I dunno, what do you do to people who break our rules? I only ever dealt with Chester and his ilk. You did good, Daisy, I'm so very proud girly.” Eggsy made sure to sound as earnest as possible.

“Daisy, I'm going to need to deal with something, but you did a really great job. If I _promise_ to braid up your hair later, can I just brush it right now?”

“Yessir, thank you Mister Merlin.”

“You know, lass, you can call me just Merlin, or Murray if you want, I think ye’ve earned it.”


	4. Clean up, Clean up...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Three whole hours, three! Do you know what can happen in three hours? The accounting intern knows.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter wrote itself, or rather, it dictated how it was to be written, despite my many attempts otherwise. All disclaimers still apply, absolutely nothing has changed.

It took three hours of his day to deal with The Accounting Intern Situation. _Three hours_ he could have spent pretending to pay attention to a meeting that's being recorded anyways, while actually playing with Daisy, or watching how she and Eggsy act around each other and other people, but nae. And it was acting, of that Merlin had no doubt. He’d seen Eggsy relaxed, high strung! over stimulated, tired,tortured, and with most guards let down. He'd seen the Mouse that morning when she thought she was actually in trouble, and how Eggsy reacted then as well, and he had never seen that raw exposed emotion in the lad. The poor boy puts on a very good display of what he thinks others expect of him, it's part of what makes him a good Knight, and after all, they all play their roles so well, don't they?

Merlin first witnessed it at Valentine’s bunker, when he was certain he entered a plane with Lancelot and Eggsy, but suddenly was on a plane with a miniaturized, replicated Harry Hart. Of course, Harry would never have passed up his...victory lap, as it were, with Tilde, and yet when it was fully on offer, Eggsy backed out. On the ride to pick up Roxy he told Merlin it was because there were more important things waiting at home. Merlin always chuckles now when he thinks on it, that momentary flare of jealousy for whomever Eggsy had, but now he knows better. Going into the fray, knowing that violence and chaos would be set free, Eggsy only asked that someone contact Michelle to keep Daisy safe. Not a significant other, nor partner, lover nor anyone important to him other than his sister. Out of literally anyone in the world he had access to, it was _only_ Daisy. Never a word for Michelle other than she was to lock herself outside the room where she couldn't harm the bairn, but not where others couldn't harm Michelle.

Merlin will often watch Eggsy slide in and out of character for mission, even if it's just a brighter version of himself. Accent a little more rough, clothes a bit more flash. When he suits up now, gods be, Merlin isn't sure there are words. After everything was running smoothly, first thing he did was make new glasses, thinner and round frames, nothing like the rest of the Knights...they makes his eyes pop. Oh, he made cute wire frames for Roxy, and a darling cat eye with jewels at the points, too, but they're for work,and she's a lady and all, with a part to play by Arthur’s side. _Sure._ And then he and Harry consulted Andrew about Eggsy’s suits. They both felt that something a bit more modern in cut, a bit less Harry in style, might be better, less of a reminder for everyone. Andrew, brilliant man he is, went and found an amalgam of styles from different eras...fit trousers and crisp shirts and suspenders with waistcoats but not jackets, or bespoke indigo denim trousers with a black shirt and driving jacket but a loose collar, or a silk tshirt under a blazer and who cared what it was paired with, it all reeked of class and substance and taste and...sex. Merlin just wants to strip the boy down and bend him over a desk or throw him against a wall, maybe lay him out on a table every time he sees him in something new and he swears Andrew is doing it on purpose.

If it isn't Andrew, it's Sacha. They have a new section on the obstacle course, would Eggsy care to run it and make sure it's acceptable? They just cleaned the outdoor lap pool, if Eggsy wanted to get in a swim before anyone else found out. Oh, Eggsy, that pommel horse, parallel bar and ring set up you asked for is complete, and the mats for floor work will be done soon, isn't that great! Merlin, _didn't see you there,_ chap, you should come and watch Eggsy with us sometime...right. They failed to mention that involved sweaty, twisting and turning and flexing Eggsy in practically falling off trackies and a tight vest. Yes, Merlin thought Sacha definitely was up to something. 

No doubt Mark would be calling a meeting now too, full of ‘oi, Murray, ye cannae be giving a warnin’ afore handlin’ me guys like tha, can ya now?’ or ‘Merrrrrrrlinnnnnn, ye ass, do somethin’ about it!’. Merlin knew Mark loved the boy enough to not miss an intern if it meant keeping Eggsy safe and comfortable, he’ll likely be a little upset Eggsy didn't come to him directly, but he won't tell the boy. How on earth does Eggsy think he's lesser because of his background, hasn't he realized that very few people outside the Knights themselves come from privilege? Chester didn't care about ‘the help’ only that a good face was presented to the peerage. That Eggsy came in, rough edges proudly on display, treated everyone equally regardless of gender or race or where they were born or who they fuck or what clothes they wear, hell, the support staff that would've gladly helped lynch Chester will form an impenetrable wall ‘round Eggsy iffen he'd only let them, and Merlin is quite certain that if his gut feeling about the Daisy situation pan out, well...they will help Eggsy cross that bridge when and if they get there. Then Eggsy will learn a lesson most employed by Kingsman do at some point. Don't burn your bridges when you can explode them, but why do that if you can just have them quietly removed from the map altogether? There was never a bridge at this road, you must have taken a different path, over there, see? There are your tracks, clear as day.

So, three hours of his day when he doesn't have anyone he needs to be handling on a mission, and he could be watching Eggsy without getting called out by his team, because Amelia always notices, and instead he was stuck dealing with The Intern. But it's done with. Well, Two and a half hours dealing with the intern direct, fifteen minutes with Elspeth, because no one else is that terrifying, then a quick fifteen for clean up leaves Merlin walking through the conference room door wiping off the last of his knives and sliding it into the sheath stitched into the leather of his suspenders. 

“Took a while, anything I need to approve, sign or ignore?” Harry asked quietly while shuffling a pile of papers to Roxy, neither looking up.

Merlin looked around the room as he gathered together some food from the warmers and his tablet and paperwork he left earlier. The meeting had carried on in his absence, which was expected, as he needn't be there for all decisions or aspects of daily operations, knowing people would filter out as they finished their business, Percival and Geraint were playing chess and picking at their lunch, he knew they could sit happily together for hours if no one (Gareth) interfered, Amelia was getting everything sorted together in a way that meant she was about ready to leave, it was dark by the stuffed animals but it looked like Eggsy had Daisy napping on him, and that left…”Where'd Gareth get off to, then?”

Percival started laughing so hard he choked on his tea and almost knocked into the board, so Geraint spoke up with that resonant, dry tone, while patting (slamming) Percival’s back, “The child has stolen him, quite sad, afraid we've lost him, the next seed should be for his replacement, start calling for candidates now, whatever shall we do without his keen insight into what I believe our darling Lancelot calls ‘American Frat Boy Humor’, oh noooo. All hope is lost, woe is me.” 

“The child? D’ye mean to tell me Mouse isn't napping with Eggsy, but is in actuality unattended with Gareth? Then who's sleeping with Eggsy?”

“Murray, stop making assumptions and shut your maw. You’re going to wake them up if you don't sit down, eat your lunch, let me tell you a short tale of friendship found. And then when you've been assuaged, you can let Harry and Roxy know what is going on. She is terribly concerned but is trying to hide it, Harry hasn't turned a page in his report in twenty minutes, Amelia is too polite to interrupt, and sadly, I kept Percival from asphyxiating on his tea. _Pity._ Before I begin,” Geraint broke off with a large sigh, “do you honestly believe that boy has had a decent amount of sleep in the last week? What about physical activity beyond playground antics? You know as well as anyone here,if not better, that he is always moving, energy to burn, unless he is hiding himself or watching someone. If he isn't going to call a sitter for a meeting, do you think he had one on standby so he could kip off to the gym, and what gym? He has custom built ones for him here, again as you well know. For as much as he loves her, he cares for her, he had a go bag packed for her for goodness sake, he was going stir crazy and shame on you for not seeing it.”

“Now you hold on Kim, it's been a near constant activity since they've been here! a whopping six hours mind, I know him enough to see he's needing his rest, and he's also being restless, so don't you ever, ever accuse me of-”

“Settle, I'm not casting aspersions, I'm just pointing out that you are not objective. As I was saying, you went out to, erm...handle things? Yes, handle things. after that, Eggsy rather effortlessly portioned a judiciously balanced meal for the child, it was brutally efficient and something he's done often enough he didn't need to think about how to slice her fruit,which veg she would or wouldn't eat, and after carefully removing every last trace of crust from her sandwich, I watched him distract her so he could slide it between the cheese and tomato.  
He ate a pear, half a turkey with mustard on rye because he wasn't paying attention and grabbed turkey stead of the pastrami, he hates deli turkey, but he was focused enough to nearly stab me when I went to hand her a cup with juice.” Kim made an incredulous face at Merlin, “Wonder where the knife came from, and who taught him that trick? Soon as he realized what he did he apologized, they finished eating, he cleaned her up, changed her clothes and they napped together about an hour. 

Murray, I promise to tell you about she and Gareth, but you have to know, have to _understand,_ he's been looking after her longer than almost a week, Roxy and Harry filled us in, bare bones. I'm not questioning that she's been in his physical possession since Thursday evening, but I would wager my most valued and treasured of possessions that he has taken care of her for a very long time, most of her life. You heard her tell Harry about him. He protects her. He keeps her safe. He doesn't have care arrangements for her, but he had a packed go bag? That doesn't strike anyone as being strange at all?

I know that I'm the best at cold reading people in this room, let alone this organization next to Elspeth, and I am telling you that he is the one who takes care of that girl, and he likely has her in his possession at least fifty per cent of the time he isn't here. Something about the most recent time, beyond the disappearance of Michelle, has him upset enough to break from whatever routine he considers normal. You need to fix this.”

“I'm trying. I don't even fully grasp what this is, though! Amelia, head back to Control and work on getting me the information about his mum and this Baker person, iffen ye can wipe the records from here since I got back in, and keep them off, I'd be obliged enough to make sure you had the entire weekend includin’ Friday off.” Amelia immediately rose, sketched a quick smile and nod at Merlin then left. He waited for the door to latch before continuing, “I don't care who tells me, but I've had a trying day, and I am being patient. Mouse. Eggsy. Gareth. Answers.”

“After cleaning up Daisy after they ate, while we were further discussing the ins and outs of the courses Eggsy proposed, the darling walked up to Gareth, grabbed his hand, walked him to her spot, and told him it was telly time. They have been asleep for about two hours. After making all of us promise upon penalties ‘to unspeakable to be spoke’ that we would get him as soon as she woke up, Eggsy said he was gonna go run the obstacle course a few times, then swim. That was about an hour ago.” Harry blurted, blushing but still looking at his papers.

“It's true,” Roxy laughed,reaching over to grab Harry’s paperwork, “Gareth woke briefly right before Eggsy left, when he tried to get up Daisy wrapped herself around both his legs like a sloth. Eggsy said that Daisy is generally a good judge of character, so if she's comfortable, he's not going to stop her.”

“He's letting our Mouse snuggle our assassin? No one thought this was strange?” 

“Our Mouse, now? Bit presumptuous, ain't it, guv?” Eggsy spoke up.

Merlin looked up just to let his head drop down and thunk on the table. “Royal We, Royal Our, much like you are letting your sister snuggle the Royal our assassin. How come no one heard you come in?” 

“Eh, she's a good judge, never been wrong yet, and it's not like any of us never killed before, speaking of, where you been? I came in as Amelia was running out, decided not to interrupt for a change." Eggsy leaned against the wall, instead of taking his normal spot. He was in clean trackies, no shirt, hair wet and a towel draped across his shoulders

Merlin looked up and around at the table. Harry, Percival and Geraint have been his coworkers, his friends, his family, for a very long time, longer than Roxy and Eggsy have been alive in at least some regards. Roxy trusted him but if push came to shove she would side with Eggsy before Kingsman, of this Merlin was certain. He took off his glasses and set them on the table, making sure they were obviously not recording, powered off his tablet and laid it screen down, carefully rolled his sleeves up past the elbows, showing off some of his tattoos. He can admit it, he was proud of them, though they were kept mostly covered at work. Starting about a palm’s width above each wrist were matched blue and red ouroboros, circling the forearms. The left side had the roots of the tree of life that went up to his arm and chest, the right part of a stag and part of a raven were visible. “Had these done after I made Merlin. There's more, some older, some newer. Some you'll like to never see, unless you catch me out my clothes for some reason, that's neither here nor there, it's just easier to have this conversation feeling like myself.

Roxanne, Eggsy, I am nae an aggressive man, nor am I a bad man. That doesn't mean I'm an especially good man neither. I am also a man who is capable of great violence if I feel it is warranted. I want, no **need** ye to understand that I keep that leashed and harnessed, and that the only thing that warrants that darkness coming out is a direct threat ‘gainst me family. I'll do damned near anything if it means keeping those I love safe. It is, after all, why I'm here, the voice in yer ear, eyes in the back o’yer heads, keepin’ watch and gettin’ ye home. 

I have a handful of agents who work under me I'd trust with those of ye in this room, but at the end of it all, you're my people. I will work with any Knight in this organization, and I will do my level best for any one of them. I'm the only Merlin, sure, and I head my departments with pride, but I'm nae the only handler and other Knights have their preferences and rightly so. I know that Caradoc will fight harder to come home to Morgaine than he ever will to come home to me, and that's fine, it's the way it should be.

The people in this room, right now? You are my family. And I will do great and terrible things to protect you. To keep you safe, in the field, in the manor, and in the world. And if that means breaking a nose, breaking a few fingers, mebbe stabbing someone in the shoulder once or five times, making sure they understand I can and will do so much worse if they put mine in harms way again, and then turning them over to Elspeth to be properly terminated, that's what I do.”

“Merlin, you sayin’ you roughed Gabriel up, stabbed them, just for having a peice he wasn't s’posed to?” Eggsy asked, blank faced.

“I'll not lie to ye, Eggsy. I promise. Here and now, _witnessed,_ I will not lie to ye and I will not physically harm ye unless it's to maintain a cover. I roughed him up for having a weapon he wasn't supposed to have, and I have no clue iffen he was trained to use it. I stabbed him in the shoulder ‘cause I thought maybe then he'd understand to stop trying to ask ye out, you said no for feks sake, and then, _**then,**_ because I didn't like the way he spoke about Ms Mouse, I frog marched him with bloody nose, broken fingers, and three of my knives still in his shoulder all the way to deal with Elspeth.”

“Oh,” Eggsy breathed deeply, “I am really inappropriately turned on right now.”


	5. He's Oh So Special

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daisy, Gareth, deep conversations and revelations.  
> or not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I sat down to write this chapter and my brain went Daisy wants to speak, and I went, no. Then my brain went Okay, but how about Gareth? And I was like, maybe, lets start writing and see what happens...this is how you get 1500 words that've been run thru the Daisy filter-I really hope it doesn't suck.
> 
> Writing this, and getting your feedback is such an amazing respite for me, even when I am so frustrated with it not going the speed I originally intended. Your reaction has been humbling, and positive and I am so grateful and thankful for you all, you've no idea.  
> no beta/brit picker/sweet bringer of sanity

Daisy yawned and stretched, flopped onto her back and shook out her arms and wiggled and kicked her feet. Her pillow person is taller than Eggsy, because she only hit on their body not their face when she ‘stretched’, and they're not mean, or at least not MeanDean mean _,_ because they haven't pushed or shoved her off, haven't yelled or screamed or said anything scary. She's at work with Eggsy. The big house, like Bear’s, not like a warehouse. Her pillow person has a name like what Mumchelle calls Eggsy but not quite...Garys...Garish...Gareth!

“Gareth, you up?” She whispered, the rest the adults were talking, they didn't know she was up because they were still talking and they always stop when they know she's listening. Eggsy doesn't, he just tries not to use MeanDean words and sounds around her, but he talks. He knows, though. Mouse can hide anywhere, be so super quiet, hear anything, see anything, should just tell her and make it easy. This time, something is different this time, though.

“Yeah, yeah…’m up.” Gareth carefully adjusted until Daisy was on the floor next to him.

“Shhhhhhhhhh, ‘m try’n’a listen’” she scolded.

“Nope, right now we’re gonna quiet up and _watch_ , listening is important and all, but from a distance what you hear, wee one, isn't nearly as important as what you see. Get on yer belly, like me, here.” Gareth showed her by doing a push-up then dropping down, so his arms were folded by his sides and not tucked under him. “Good girl, iffen you need to, you can tuck your hands right under your chin to hold your head.”

“What we watchin’ fer? Alls I see is feets.” Daisy whispered, doing her best to mimic Gareth's position.

“Okay...you saw Merlin’s knives and Gabriel's gun, because you knew where to look, but also _how_ , from lower down it's unexpected and harder to hide, right? So here's your brother, my bosses, and a few other boring old adults, they think they're safe, but we see what they hide under the table, yeah? Tell me what you see, little Mouse.”

Daisy wrinkled her nose. “I see you're weird, hey! No poking! Okay I'm lookin, I'll tell Eggsy you poked me, he'll tell Merlin on you...oh, I see, like how Mister Percy and Mister Gray...Gear...Mister Not are holdin’ hands, an Mister ArthurHarry is wearing sleeps time shoes, and Miss LadyRocks has very pretty toes today.”

“And that tells us that Percy and _Geraint_ are...friends, and we let Harry wear what he wants as long as he's dressed, and Miss Roxy really is lovely….what about your brother and, oh! No, let's not look too closely at him, that's awkward. Merlin! What do you see for him under the table?”

Daisy turned and squinted at Gareth, “I see you _liiiiike Miss_ _Roxy_! You went all pink!” She muffled her giggle behind her hand, “so, Merlin, he's got less sharps than earlier, no more socks on, it looks like someone colored on his leg. I colored my leg once, woulda gotted swat for it but Eggsy washed it best he could, then he drew really very pretty flowers and mouses on it an’ he had me try and draws some on a paper. He tole Mumchelle that he wanted to show me what his tattoon was supposed to look like. The mouses and daisies I drewed him, he has them on the back of his leg. Iffen ye ever see him in his pants, like he's bringing you cocoa at sleeps but you was already supposed to be sleeps? You can see them, and since it's a tattoon it'll not wash off.”

“Oh, Daisy,” Gareth sighed.

“E’r’yone keeps saying that. Why?”

Gareth slid and scooched back until he was snuggled against Bear again. Daisy gave one last look at everyone under the table across the room and followed sitting close but not touching him. “Mouse, you are a very clever girl, and there are some people who see that as a gift, and some who don't know what to do with it. Your brother? It is obvious he loves you, and you are important to him and you already told us how very hard he works to keep you safe and secure. I think there are people, too many, who don't see that you are amazing and don't treat you like a gift. And I think that is not right.”

“I thought it was ‘cause I said something wrong. Sometimes people say 'oh Daisy' when I've been naughty, and sometimes when I've been good, and I don't know if I should make myself really small like Eggsy showed me if he's not there or if I can be all big like he is when he believes me when I say he done good.” Daisy watched as Gareth took a deep, shuddering breath, clasped his hands together, breathed in and out of them like his fingers were cold, drop them back down. It looked like he counted to ten. Then he closed his eyes and took a really big breath again.

“Okay, Mouse, I've an idea, because I think anymore of this talk needs Eggsy, and Merlin, and maybe a rooftop and ammunition…okay, I'm really, _really_ good at hitting thing from far away, so I'm going to teach you some tricks, and we are going to have fun, and I promise if we get in _any_ trouble I'll take all the blame. They won't even think to get upset with you, trust me.”

“Why?”

“Because I asked? I work with your brother and he does?”

“Nooo! Why will you play with me? Don't got to. Ain't making you. What d’you want?” Daisy narrowed her eyes and pinched her mouth. She very much looked like a smaller, blonde, feminine and pissed off Eggsy in that moment.

“I thought I explained. I just want to be a friend. I don't have many, I don't think you have enough, plus, right now, we get to throw things at the adults.”

“Yer older than Eggsy, y’are an adult.”

“Nuh-uh! I'm like, ten years older than him and Roxy, it isn't that much. Ask anyone here you’ve already met and they’ll tell you, I don’t count as a grownup unless I’m working. Well, don’t ask your brother, he hasn’t figured that out yet, because I’ve tried to show him I’d be good for Roxy because his opinion matters to her and I don’t know why I’m telling this to a three year old.”

“Me neither.” Daisy looked at him shaking her head. “Okay, throwin’ stuff without getting in trouble? How does that work?”

“I didn’t say we wouldn’t get in trouble, I said _you_ wouldn’t. It’s easy,three special steps. I’ll show you the way, just three special steps .”

“Oh! My! God! _You’re Oso!_ ” Daisy was awestruck.

“Not quite, but I do know his tricks.”

“No. You’re Oso. I bet your watch even talks to you and does cool stuff.”

“Well, I mean-”

“You’reactuallySpecialAgentOsothisissocoolIneedEggsytomakeyouearsandpawsandandand”

“Slow down. I don’t need bear ears, and paws would make my work really hard, but I am really happy you are excited. Now shhhhh. Step one, look where you are going to throw, Step two, breathe really slow, and step three, pull back and let go. Here’s a grape from earlier, see if you can hit Mister Harry.”

Daisy took the grape and looked at the side of Harry’s head, she breathed slowly, pulled back her arm, and released. She watched the grape sail through the air and…

“Alright, why am I getting hit with a grape, first half an hour of whispering and giggling and shouting and now this, what are you two even _doing_ back there!” Roxy stood up from the table, wiping grape off of her cheek.

“He did it!” Daisy pointed at Gareth before ducking as much behind Bear as she could. “It was Special Agent Oso!”

“Really, David, who throws a grape?”

“I’m...sorry? I was aiming for someone else?”

“You were aiming for someone else and hit me in the face instead. _You. Our Sniper_. Cannot throw a grape from across a large room with accuracy?”

“Well, you see-”

“He got tracked by how pretty yer toes are, and he wants you to go get icecreams with us.” Daisy said from behind Bear.

“Really, David? You want to take Miss Daisy and I for icecream, because I have pretty toes?” Roxy asked.

“Erm, not exactly, but if it works for you, then yes.”

“Well, I’ll have to check my schedule, and clear it with Eggsy, and then suppose we can set a date.”

“Oso, that’s three steps! You can totally do that!” Daisy giggled.

“Gareth?” Eggsy asked, “Would you mind keeping an eye on her a bit longer? I know it’s a lot to ask, but Merlin and I and Elspeth are supposed to meet to go over some options for...things, and I just, I mean, I don’t-”

“Naw, mate, I’ve got this, she and I are friends now, you do what you have to. Anyways, it's _Elspeth_. I think I’m going to go show her that we’ve got _Scribble Sticks_ for the SmartScreen.”

 


	6. On the transitive properties of ducks, wood, and other things that float and or burn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh...  
> oh?  
> OH
> 
> or in which Eggsy is confused about a lot of things, and that accounting intern is a right bastard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Notice I updated the tags to add anxiety attack. The description is based on my experience, loosely.  
> There is A LOT that happens here, and it's kind of frenetic, but I cannot smooth it out, the characters won't let me.  
> It is as always unbeta'd and not britpicked, all errors are mine, all accents, inflections and the like come from my Scotch friends, who insisted that 'doon' is indeed the phonetic way to pronounce down, they also provide me with Gaelic naming mechanics, and vocab words, so there's that.  
> Special thanks to anarchcox and aphnxrising for being there when I had moments of "I'm losing control of my characters/chapter eep" moments, being reassuring when I needed it.

“I heard that if she were to unwrap her braids, there's enough to make two full hangman nooses, _and she's done it.”_

“Yeah, _but I heard_ that she singlehandedly stopped the attempt on the Queen’s life in 1986!”

“There wasn't an attack on the Queen in ‘86, mate.”

“I know, that's what I'm saying, innit?”

Eggsy did his best to ignore the frantic whispers around him as he followed Merlin down the myriad twists and turns en route to the deepest, darkest corners of the dungeon, also known as the Human Resource and Capital Division located in the second basement...not all that deep or dark as far as the manor goes. Truth be told the offices themselves were really nice, they just got plush new carpeting, the walls were all a rich, warm mahogany and all of the chairs were super comfy. Most of the HR employees were awesome, as well, super welcoming and a veritable wealth of knowledge not only on policy and procedure but you wanted a nice nightcap near a Kingsman owned flat? They knew where, needed a last minute reservation because you were on mission over your anniversary? They'd hook you up. Granted the common belief was that it was to lull you into a false sense of security, get you all at ease before Elspeth was unleashed. This belief ran tangential to the theory that every Maitre’d, doorman, bouncer, florist and personal shopper in all of Europe was pants-shitting terrified of her.

“I heard she got into a fight with Chuck Norris, and he knocked himself out to save her the hassle.”

“You know, I never had a trick knee until she wrote me up.”

“She the reason McMillan’s cows ran dry.”

“I heard she made a deal with _Lucifer_ , he'd give her five souls a year if she promised to not overthrow him.”

Eggsy almost ran into Merlin’s back, the other man stopped so suddenly.

“She turned me into a newt!” Merlin shouted.

“A newt?” Someone asked from behind a partially closed door.

“Well, I got better!”

Eggsy dropped his head against Merlin’s rather surprisingly broad shoulders to hide his laughter at the sudden sound of work starting around them, spoke quietly enough he hoped only Merlin could hear, “Does Elspeth weigh the same as a duck then?”

“Nae lad," Merlin tipped his chin down over his shoulder, spoke nearly in a whisper. Eggsy had to press himself just a wee bit closer to hear everything. He wouldn't be complaining any time soon. “Elspeth isn't foolish enough a witchywoman to be tricked up like that. How many times have you actually met her?”

Eggsy shifted again, settling more of his chest along Merlin's back, resting his face in the crook between his shoulder and ear, not caring they were in one of the basement hallways where any number of the ‘regular office staff’ could walk past. First, like any staff they had qualified as ‘regular’ unless Eggsy’s somewhat lacking education completely missed the part wherein everyone was trained in at a minimum hand to hand combat and improvised weaponry. Second, he's had a really rough week, alright? And here's this gorgeous, scary smart, wicked fit, scary _scary_ man who repeatedly has been a safe harbor, who has upended everything, _who tortured someone_ , to keep Daisy safe. So yeah, someone might poke a head over a cube or out a doorway, and they might see him draped across Merlin’s back, but Eggsy happens to know for fact it's not the most scandalous thing anyone's walked up on in the halls here. Anyways, they'd just see him...resting...against Merlin. Not anything inappropriate in that, right? He took a deep breath to center himself before talking and oh... _oh_ …

Something peaty, like scotch, warm and worn like old leather, that subtle hint of acrid you get from spent tobacco, cordite even though he knew Merlin had fired a gun today, and the bite of salt on skin. This is...how did...Gods above but has Merlin _always_ smelt like this? Sort of scent that makes ye wanna just rub all up against it like a cat in sunlight? Okay Eggsy, deep breath to calm down and shit, no, not a deep breath…

“Mmmmmmm, Elspeth herself? I never actually met her, only talked via glasses once, when she wanted to know why I needed a flat with a second room and not an office or den, who'd be staying with me, for how long, stuff like that. I answered truthful like about Daisy staying wif me when mum was busy or when I missed her, just couldn't understand why it matters. Merlin, what cologne you wear?”

“It makes sense to ask, iffen yer mum was going to live with ye there'd be security protocols, or if ye had a woman or man we didn't know about. Not like you'd be needing a roommate, it's part of why we provide housing, to ensure no roommates that aren't family or coworkers, security risk and all. ‘m not, just soap and the washing powder from my laundry, why?”

Eggsy felt the barest hint of fingertips slip across the back of his knuckles on his right hand, where he realized he was holding, _gripping, clenching_ at the top of Merlin’s hip, halfway between his trousers and shirt, his left was on Merlin’s bare bicep, if he focused he could feel the textural difference of tattooed skin versus empty.

Oh.

_Oh!_

He noticed, this close, he could see a hint of chest hair at Merlin's open collar, see hints of darkness and color that must be more tattoos, only visible with how snug Merlin's shirt was being pulled by him.

“Erm, right,...yeah uhm...Elspeth, I've only dealt with her the once. She seemed nice enough in a ‘do what I say an I’ll grace ye to live another day’ sort of way. Though the rumors, they ain't helpin’.” Eggsy deliberately flexed both hands open, dropping them at his side and stepped back marveling at how Merlin's trousers fit against a muscled ass and thighs before tapering slightly towards the ankles, the somehow bare ankles….why isn't Merlin wearing socks? Andrew deserved a raise for those trousers though, that shirt. “I've spoke to you when ye’ve been a few sheets to the wind, and exhausted on top, and I don't think yer accent was ever as strong as her’s, talking to Mark right after her was a trip, he was clear and concise, not like I've room to talk, but yeah. Not like I'm gonna ask if the rumors are true, I mean, you know what the gossip is like around here, it's half dozen one they're like to be right. This one’s kissing on that one's fighting the other one’s secretly an elf for Santa.” He was rambling. Knew it, too, but it's that type of ramble where the words are falling out of your mouth and you can't do anything but hope the don't hurt anyone when they hit the floor, break anything and make a mess, the very ramble that makes the expression spilling your guts make sense.

“Fer instance any one of the folks who saw that just now are probably already telling people about how I threw myself at ye in the hall, or how we've a sordid love affair and that why you were so bent out of shape with Gabriel, and really, who would blame them for talkin? If they knew how good you were and warm and how nice ya smelt, that I ain't been wif anyone since before I started here cause it’s not like I can really go after blokes and deal with Dean on the regular and I've never much fancied women for all I act it, even if it were to get that far for anything to happen I need to _trust_ a man afore I'd let him...anyhow not like anyone here really _knew_ that before, other than when I blurted out how turned on I with you takin’ down Gabriel like that and being vicious for me an’ mine and blunt honest, I'd not mind showing ye how _very appreciative_ but I don't want ye thinking it's just that, cause it ain't and why can't I just shut up, fucking hell _I. Am. So. Sorry.”_ Eggsy ran his hand over his neck, grabbed the towel that was still there, because of course he'd be walking around in a vest, trackies, bare feet and a towel, what the hell sort of bleeding professional was he, and covered his face.

“Eggsy,” Merlin said, “Eggsy, no. Don't be like that now. C’mon lad, lookit me...Eggsy, take the towel off yer head...Eggsy... _Mordred, now!”_

Eggsy snapped his head up, the need to listen to that voice say that name in that tone was Pavlovian at this point. “Sir?”

Eggsy watched as Merlin inhaled sharply, watched as Merlin stepped forward to bridge the small space betwixt them, watched and slowed his breathing purposefully as Merlin reached one large, long fingered hand up and wrapped it around the back of his neck. Eggsy stood so very still as Merlin leaned a hair’s breadth closer to whisper in his ear. “Nae lad, not right now I'm not, maybe after we've worked some other stuff out, you can _earn_ that. We will finish this fascinating bit o’talk after we've done what must. Elspeth, arrangements for Mouse, maybe after that we can go somewhere private and discuss what just happened, and how it took this to bring it out. No shame, no embarrassment, just two adult men, having adult discourse. Chin up, back straight, let's go.”

Eggsy followed, all the bearing he learned while a Marine on display, questioning if he actually felt a nip on his cartilage or not before Merlin backed away. Surely he wasn't mad? That wasn't the tone nor actions of a work friend, it was...more. He tried not to think about how stupid it was to walk into Elspeth’s office, totally unprepared as he was thinking about Merlin’s back and wondering what he'd find inked there, likely sporting a visible erection through his thin workout clothes. For fucks sake, he wasn't even wearing shoes. Elspeth was gonna eat him alive and he'd never have a chance to see Merlin naked. God the man was fit. Seemed to like being called Sir just then, too. Not anything Eggsy’d ever done before but not anything he was against either, just never gave it much thought, though he couldn’t help but, now.

“Eggsy, you with me now?”

“Wot? Sorry Merlin, lost in me head. What’d I miss?” Eggsy clenched his fist to keep from showing he was shaking, dropped his eyes back down so as not to look behind the desk he was stood in front of. By all counts he was about to meet the most terrifying person on the face of the planet, and really considering who he worked with, that said a lot.

“I'd like to formally introduce ye to Elspeth NicMhuirich, she who secretly controls Kingsman, despite what anyone else may claim. Elspeth, this is Gary Unwin, but he prefers Eggsy unless you'd rather use Mordred.”

Eggsy looked up extending his hand to shake, then dropping it by almost a foot. He could feel his crooked grin break across his face, unfortunately he could also feel the words tumble right out that grin, “Nice to finally meet you, ma’am, why’s everyone so terrified of a small thing like you? I was expecting some great hulking beast of a woman, but yer just a tiny lil gramma now, ain't you just? Fuck I'm doing it again. Dammit, I don't mean to keep swearing. Why aren't ye stopping me yet unless, oh my god the rumors are true an yer gonna kill me now, Merlin look after Dais for me, yeah?”

Elspeth grabbed his hand, firmly but not hard. “A’ight ye, shut it. Now, turn about fer me.”

“‘Scuse me?”

“Ye heard, iffen ye not ken my meaning, mebbe dif’rent words aye? Spin. Show me yerself boyo, wanna see the laddie that's made me own turn a twit!”

“...wha?”

“Fine then. Just stand still.”

Eggsy froze in place as Elspeth, all four foot ten inches of her, slowly made a circuit all the way around him, occasionally stopping to herm and hah, and he's pretty sure he felt a spindly yet firm poke to his side, a swat to his ass, but really, at the moment he was still trying to figure out what was going on.

“Murray O’Mhuirich!” Elspeth suddenly snapped, “Did ye drag him doon with no rest, I see ye dinnae let ‘im dress proper. Not fussing, he's fine enough to be sure, welp of half yer age tho the boy is, but seems smitten, by my sources.”

“Auntie!” Merlin snapped, “We talked ‘bout this, not here for the love of Christ, woman, and he and I-”

“Don't take that tone nor Lord’s name, I'll ‘ave ye over me knee, Murray!”

“Wait, hold up! No one’s takin the piss, right? This is legit? Elspeth is yer auntie? NicMhuirich...daughter of Murray, right? For feks sake Merlin, your name is literally Murray grandson of Murray? That's bloody well amazing! Do the others know this? They can't no way they would let you live this down, and yer tellin’ me that big and tall and broad you are, you is this tiny thing’s nephew? Looks like a kindly gnomes wife she does. How did I...I'm doing it again, aren't I?” Eggsy couldn't tell if the look on Elspeth’s face was amusement or confusion or horror. It was Horfusioment, he determined, the bastard hybrid of all three. He wasn't leaving this office alive.

“Okay, Elspeth,” Merlin ceded as he guided Eggsy to an unreasonably comfortable chair and squeezed his shoulder until Eggsy closed his mouth, “maybe I should have let him rest more, so he wouldn't find a _strong family name_ so damned amusing, but he napped, he worked out and seemed alert, you told me ye figured things out and we needed to talk. His life, _Daisy's life,_ is more important right now than propriety, dammit!”

Eggsy tried not to say it, but it still fell out, “ _So damned hot_! Shit! Sorry, Missus NicMhuirich, you are correct, I haven't slept hardly at all the last almost week now, cat naps really, it's catchin’ up I think so iffen the two of ye will excuse me, I'll be on my way?”

“Nae, laddie, sit, listen and it's Miss, I ain't never been tied to a man, never will. Murray, let go the boy, he ain't about to do a runner.” Elspeth stared at Eggsy until he nodded. “Gabriel Tallowick, aged twenty-three, accounting intern nigh on six months, had three left afore Mark, the darlin, would've let him go at the end his term. Wasn't performing up to spec, ye see.”

“Who did his screening, how'd he get in with an unregulated weapon, and why wasn't he already let go?” Merlin questioned rapid fire.

“Best I can tell one o’my team that was let go a few months back screened him. His internship agreement was written that unless there were gross negligence we could nae term him before its conclusion. And bein’ no one monitors the employees for contraband comin’ _in_ just going out, we assume that paltry gun was brought in and left on site.”

“Alright, but how do all this, a big ass super secret spy organization, decide to take interns in the first place? Seems a bit mental, don't it?”

“Listen and learn laddie, the shop itself needs a good face, ye ken? There also be so much office tripe to wade through that the likes of ye never seen. Murray as the Merlin has a fair idea but he doesn't deal with the, and I quote, mundane staff. To be sure, he's right by them, as he was raised to be, knows names and whatnot, but it isn't his area, his hands are full enough with you all. We have a few schools we work with, some are referred by friends, think a less challenging and lethal trial than ye had and department specific. We're not going to make our kitchen crew run the course with their knife rolls.” Elspeth took a deep breath, reached up and adjusted her crown of braids, waited until Eggsy made eye contact. “But, lookin’ deep at his schooling, it was paid for by a mister Dean Anthony Baker, and tha’s an issue now, ain't it?”

Eggsy felt his heart stutterstop before racing, gripped the arms of the chair hard enough his fingerprints are probably ingrained in the leather, tucked his feet up under his thighs and pressed as far into the corner of the back as he could before oh so quietly speaking. “How? How did he get recruited by us then, how did no one find this out, how did he get _in here near_ _my girl,_ how are we keeping m’self and Daisy safe? Do we know where Michelle is? Is she involved? Fuck. Fuck, I can't bring him to yer doorsteps, I'm so sorry, I know we face evil everyday, but he's just cruel and heartless and that's a different level, his instinct is to spoil anything good and I'm, please, I don't…” He stopped talking when he became aware of Merlin and Elspeth both kneeling in front of him. Well, Merlin was kneeling, Elspeth may just have been scooched down a bit. It's hard to tell with her. Shit, shit damn fuck. Eggsy can't breathe and and and he can't feel his fingers and where's Daisy right now he needs to get to her, and they need to go...

“Shhhhhh, hush now, breathe slow and deep for me, slow in and deep down now hold and slow out, all of it, back in, just like that Eggsy. I'm going to touch ye now, is that alright?” Eggsy nodded, was aware of the light quality changing as someone moved, felt Merlin's hand across the back of his neck, warm and strong, gently rubbing. “I swear to you, there is nowhere safer than with me, here. Once I know you are actually present, aware this is _not_ _your_ _fault_ , I've a few of the same questions, let's give her a chance to answer?”

Eggsy sat with Merlin grounding him until his breathing leveled out, his heart stopped pounding, and his eyes focused again, hating the tremors he was unable to control or hide. He didn't know if it was minutes or seconds or hours. Finally he looked up and nodded for Elspeth to speak.

“I've got some of yer answers, surely, but I'm not even sure ove the right questions for others. First and foremost, your girly is fine, I have so many eyes and ears tuned to her, a literal alarm will sound if there's danger. Here's what I be knowin’ about Gabriel, he was in a program that allowed a student to propose their internship location from a pre approved list. Kingsman Tailors has long been on that list, and he was initially brought in through the shop on his request. When it was seen he had a way of following money trails, we brought him in the manor as I said, under a now terminated employee's request, we will investigate, and retribution will be swift, and painful.

You are bringing nothing but good to us, lad, dinnae doubt that, we have had far worse than this Tallowick or Baker fellas at our door, believe me, I've been here over fifty years now, I saw all of Chester’s reign, and let me say you did us a great service removin’ him. Your Merlin here has requisitioned some serious man hours into scouring information on your mum and Baker, we will have those answers soon. As for the rest of your answers, I'd like to introduce you to someone. OPHELIA!!”

Merlin tightened his grip on Eggsy briefly, before moving to apparently brace against the chair. “Brace yourself, boyo. It isn't bad, at all, just _a lot_.”

A bookshelf behind Elspeth swung forward, and out from the office it was concealing strode, well...to be honest, it looked like Merida, but surely Eggsy would know if they had actual Disney princesses on staff...plus Merida was animated, like drawn not animated like this real person who was, well, vibrant. So much curly red hair, large green eyes, a sure stride and an unmistakable brogue belting out “Uncle Merlin!”

“Ophelia NicillMhuirich , child, none o’that now, you know I'm a cousinish, now c’mere, give me hugs and explain why you're not in school?”

“Uncle Merlin, it's Ophelia _Butcher_. Because no, it ends with me it's an horrible last name, hardly anyone says it right, and unless you progenate there ain't no more Murrays. No offense but iffen ye woulda allowed me to make it McMurray fine, but no, you and Gramma didn't, so it's Butcher now, innit? Not like I wouldn't be changing if I got married, for fook sake, and we all know that ain't happening. Anyways, I thought it was cute, what with all the blade skills ya showed me, it fits me, no?”

“Oh, oh my stars, no. That's it. You've got to be shitting me with this. You've surpassed pulling my leg and went right to pulling my whole body!” Eggsy laughed, “First off, you three are the most frightening family unit I've _ever witnessed_. We've the secretly hot, bald, Scottish ninja, his gramma, the most interesting gnome in the world, and now a lethal Princess Merida? This ain't real life. On top of that, I've landed into dealings with a nursery rhyme.”

“Mordred, you had me with ninjas, gnomes and kickass princesses, lost me at Mother Goose.”

“Rub a dub-dub, three men in a tub? You, Dean and that damn intern!”

“Tallowick! I get it.” Ophelia jumped and clapped, “Butcher, Baker, Candlestick maker, that is hilarious, in a really demented way as I'm fully prepared to dismember either of them for getting to close to your sister. I dunno iffen they told you, but I was in school to get my early childhood educators certificate, yeah? And I hear you need a Nanny, and I've got a room at Merlin’s flat already for when I was visiting or doing combat training.”

“Come again?” Eggsy asked.

“Lookit you, did you finish or get kicked out again? Ne’er mind, you're always welcome at mine, kept the room just how you like it. I don't know why I didn't think of this earlier, Elspeth, you are, of course a genius. I trained you up on knives myself, know you can handle a gun, and I'd trust you with my own bairn if I had one. I'm just so proud of ye, Ophelia, even if you changed names. You're da would've been proud, were he here to see it.” Merlin spoke, almost running Eggsy over.

“Okay, but what's going on?” Eggsy demanded.

“Oh, laddie, I'm sorry. We railroaded you.” Elspeth spoke up, silencing the others. “Well, we railroaded both of you, but Murray picked it up fast. My granddaughter, she's going to care for the wee Luchag while you're working. Ophelia has site access and her own office space, not to mention she was practically raised on the manor grounds, so they can stay out the way if you need them here, otherwise she can stay with Murray, and be on hand at home.”

“It's excellent that you want to watch my Daisy, but she needs to meet you and be okay first, and it's not going to be permanent, just til I know what's with Michelle, and what the hell is Luchag, and I don't know if you all missed this, but _I don't live with Merlin.”_ Eggsy was somewhat exasperated.

Merlin sighed. “I'd hope we would've had more time, maybe discussed this privately. I don't think it's safe for you to stay at yours, if Michelle knows where y’are, it's likely Baker knows, and I don't want anything to happen to you. As for Luchag-”

“So uncle Merlin told Gramma that it's been almost a week, right? And Michelle just said one day, and there's been no contact since then. And it seems like you have an awful lot of stuff for your sister because yer mum isn't providing it for you. Also your sister pretty much announced that ye take beatings for her, and that's heroic but it's not cool it's happening in the first place, you know that, right? Most people don't need to do what you do. Anyways, we can file for you to get temporary custody, because Michelle abandoned Daisy. Then we’re gonna move the two,of you into Uncle Merlin’s where he can make sure you're safe and maybe tap that,Mel we don't need to listen to him pine, and can't say I blame him either, because damn!”

“Oh,” Eggsy sputtered, “I...that is, I'm just...you pine over me?”

“Pine is a strong word, not altogether inaccurate though.”


	7. Where can shadow be?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We learn about Merlin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As before, all the same disclaimers as previous, I"ll let you know if this ever becomes beta'd or brit-picked, as always anyone interested let me know.  
> I check for syntax, parsing and grammar errors so assume any you find are stylistic choices or I just totally flipped my lid.  
> This went monologue heavy and intense, so enjoy!

“I know it's a lot to take in, and I'll not force ye to do anything you don't want, but I'll not apologize for doing what I think is best to make sure yer safe, protected, and maybe even allow you to let down your guard.” Merlin said, staring at Eggsy over the rim of his mug. Somehow, he was able to talk Elspeth and Ophelia into giving them the illusion of privacy, knowing full well that the only truly private locations were his office, her office and personal quarters _only_ if tablets, glasses,computers and the like were completely powered down. “I may have...overstepped...my bounds, but Eggsy, ye asked me to help, to fix this, told me _I was magic_ , and this is the result. I'll not let harm come to ye, and I”ll not apologize for it.”

“I need you to understand that _my life_ isn't a mission. My _sister_ ain't a mission. She's the only thing of worth I've got, the only reason I didn't run away, as a kid or an adult. If Mouse hadn't come along I'd’ve gotten gone, no more Eggsy. She is _everything_ and what I want don't matter none!”

“Eggsy, look at me, please.” Merlin waited until Eggsy made eye contact, held it until it was just edging intense before continuing. “I know ye cannot fathom what she means to me, because ye dinnae know what _you_ mean to me as I've not told, and I've only just met her this mornin’. I understand that there is much that needs to be shared ‘bout why ye fear Dean the way ye do, why you'd not ask for help until it was unavoidable with yer mum and Mouse. I can't say I completely get it, but I want to. Right now, I'm askin’ that you let Daisy meet Ophelia, that you will come home with me, at least for a few days, let someone else help shoulder the burden. If Mouse doesn't like my girl, Ophelia don't come near her again. Let _me_ carry your weight, let _me_ make some decisions, let _me_ give you what you need. Can you do that, boyo?”

Merlin watched as Eggsy went from being hyper vigilant to slowly relaxing against the chair, as his eyes became a bit hooded, his breathing shifted.

“You’re not playing fair, guv.”

“Nae, but then, I'm not playing at all. You made it clear your life isn't a game, and I'm inclined to agree. Now, can we call Gareth to bring in Mouse?” Eggsy sighed and slowly nodded.

Merlin made the call while trying not to watch Eggsy adjust himself in his seat. The lad had been through so much, not just recently but in his whole life. Merlin would have to be wary and cautious of how he approached things, but contrary to popular belief that wasn’t actually his strong suit. He stood and cracked open the door, listening, and as soon as he heard the distinctive pattern of Gareth trying to be heard, as well as more rapid sound of someone scurrying to keep up, he started to sing. “ _Ohhhh where oh where oh where is Shadow? Where could Shadow be?”_

A bright giggle preceded Daisy through the door, “I'm not Shadow, Mister Merlin, I'm a mouse!”

“Good afternoon again lass. Remember, just Merlin works for me iffen you are comfortable using it. I don't want you to _ever_ do something that makes you uneasy just cause I asked.”

“Wossat mean?” Mouse tilted her head in a way that mimicked her namesake rather well.

“Well, little buddy, I think he's saying if he tells you to do something, and you don't want to, not because it's not fun or you don't like doing it but have to anyways like going to bed early, but you don’t want to because it feels icky inside? Then you don't do it. And if he insists, or tries and do it anyways, what do you do?” Gareth asked,immediately dropping to her level.

“That's easy Oso! Step one, say no! Step two, stand tall! Step three is kick them in the side of their knee as hard I can, like you shown me!”

Merlin bit back a smile and Eggsy was chuckling. “Gareth, did ye teach the lady how to dislocate someone's kneecap?”

“Erm...yes? I mean, that's alright, isn't it? We all want her to be safe.”

“You did well, David. Eggsy and I need her back, though, and I've mission reports for you to sign off on. I'll give you a moment.”

Merlin waited while Gareth and Daisy did an elaborate handshake and dance combination, and Gareth promised to see her again soon. As soon as he was gone Daisy flung her arms around Merlin’s legs and then ran to the chair and crawled up onto Eggsy's lap.

“There's my Mouse, you were good while I was busy, yeah? And Gareth was nice? No one made a fuss?” Eggsy asked, smoothing back her curls and picking bits of detritus out.

“Yup. Met Sacha, played on _BIG_ monkey bars, played chase round the hedge maze. It. Was. AWESOME! Can Merlin braid my hair? Said he would.”

“Well love, that's a question for-”

“Hop on over and of course. I've got binders and a comb in my pocket, and things to ask you anyways.” Merlin said, sitting cross legs on the floor and patting the space in front of him. Daisy scrambled off Eggsy and situated on the floor scooched as close to his legs and hummed as he started to gently and slowly, tip up, comb and clean her hair, working out the snarls and leaf and twiggy bits. “D’ye want to know where I learned to do wee lassie’s hair up pretty like?”

“Is it a big story?” Daisy asked.

“Nae, not long, but yea, big important.” Merlin waited until she nodded, then started two plaits in her hair, “ye’ve such long hair iffen it's straight, bet it's never been cut. I know someone else who’s only _ever_ cut her hair when it had bit needed trimming. That is my auntie Elspeth, and when I was very small, like you, she took care of me.”

“Like Eggsy an’ me?”

“Very much so, my littlest Wildflower. Well, her hair is verra springy indeed, and once a week she would wash it in the morn, let it loose all day, then make two long plaits and twist and turn and coil them into a crown. I asked if she were a queen, and she said she was the ruler behind a king, and if I wanted, I could be a wizard if I listened and learned and didn't get caught misbehaving too much. She had a son, who was older than I was, who would always laugh and tell us we were silly. Auntie said he was too serious to be a wizard, and she’d not lose another knight, and asked him to go to school for other things. It was just me, auntie and my cousin.

As I got older, auntie taught me to plait her hair, said it would make my fingers fast and she was right. I started learning more about being a wizard, and my cousin met a very lovely lady and they wed and had a wee bairn their own, Ophelia. Girly was born with a head o’curls and great big green eyes, you remind me of her just blonde. Love that girl, I do. When my cousin and his wife we’re in the accident, she was younger’n you, and auntie took her in just like she had me,when I was wee. That's when I learned how to do little girl hair, when I'd be home, or when we would all come to work together.Some people forget we've had children here before, as they stayed out the way, you see, but others played with her too, and it was only a few years afore she was old enough for schoolin’ and the like.

So, Mouse, my wildflower of a girl, that's how I learned to make you pretty braid crowns, and all about Ophelia and Elspeth. If you like Ophelia, we could have her help watch you, and you could come to my house for a few days sleepover, would ye like that?”

Merlin almost fell over backwards when Daisy crawled into his lap propper to cuddle him and pat his back. “So, no mum or poppa just an auntie? And then Ophelia has no mum or poppa, just a grammie? That's so sad! But you helped take care her, right Merlin? Like Eggsy does me?”

“Aye. Very close. Would you like to meet her right now? She's here, came special when she heard about you!” Merlin kept his arms around Daisy, and lifted her with him as he walked to the door behind Elspeth’s desk. Daisy nodded against his neck so he opened the door and exposed Elspeth and Ophelia standing, looking unashamed for listening. “Ye want down, or just turned around?” He asked, setting Daisy down when she wiggled.

“DaisyMouse, I'd like to introduce my auntie Elspeth, and our Ophelia. Elspeth and Ophelia, meet Daisy Unwin, she's Eggsy’s sister, and oft prefers Mouse to Daisy.”

Daisy looked at Elspeth and Ophelia much more critically than she had any of the Knights she’d met today.

“ _Luchag_ , I see yer hair is like mine, Murray did it?” Elspeth asked.

Daisy looked puzzled, then reached up and felt her little braided crown and nodded.

“D’ye talk? I once went _two whole hours_ without and it was _awful_ , time I was allowed again all my words fell out at once. I seem to think your big enough to talk, but maybe you’re called mouse because you’re so quiet?” Ophelia said, hitching her skirt up and crouching down to Daisy’s level. “I know it can be scary meeting so many people at once, but I think it’s good to practice being brave when you’re somewhere safe, even if it’s somewhere brand new, and I promise that if you are with me or auntie, you are safe, and if you’re here at the big house, you’re safe, and being with me AND auntie AND at the big house, well, we are safe as mouses in houses ain’t we?”

“You smell pretty, like sunshine. An’ you look like Merida. She’s the only princess I like, and you don’t have a mum or poppa and I have one of each but their not that good. And your grammie is ver’ small, how did she get to be a grammie while being so small, and I don't talk much as Eggsy, not always, his words fall out all at once all the time.”

“Would you like to come into the little room back here? We've tea and cakes, and Mord-Eggsy, sorry, Eggsy will be right there the whole time talkin to Uncle Merlin...Uncle Murray? You know Merlin and Murray is the same. But you and me, we need to talk too, and Gramma will be there, would that be a’ight?”

Daisy ran to Eggsy, gave him a hug and then ran back into the room behind Elspeth’s office and shut the door.

“Merlin, c’mere?” Merlin crossed the office back to Eggsy, only to find himself being wrapped in the lad’s arms. “You fuckin’ berk. Could’ve told me all that, stead of spinning a tale for Daisy. Wouldn't have had me sitting there with you looking like the world was crumbling whiles ya braided her hair. Eggsy murmured into his chest.

“Seemed fastest to do it like that. I'm sure ye still have plenty of questions.”

“Well, yeah! What happened to your mum and da? What about Ophelia's folks? Elspeth never married but had a kid, that wasn't easy when you were a child, so what's up with tha? Did she actually raise you?”

Merlin reached up to cover Eggsy’s mouth. “Hush now. I'll tell you some now, some later. What I need to know right now though is if Ophelia and Daisy get along, if there's no problems when that door opens, are ye gonna come home with me, lad? Just shake your head yes or no.” Merlin left his hand over Eggsy’s mouth, clamping a little harder when he felt him try and speak, and finally Eggsy nodded yes.

“If ye don't want to share a bed, I can and will take the couch, and sharing a bed does nae need be more than sharing a sleeping spot, but Eggsy, I'd _really_ like you in my bed, okay?” Eggsy rolled his eyes and nodded.

“I've been so very strong, all day, ye’ve no idea, since you called...longer even, but this morning changed things. I need to know it's alright, can I take a kiss from you?” Merlin felt a sharp exhale across his fingers, could feel a tremor before, again, Eggsy nodded. He let go of Eggsy’s mouth, instead placing a thumb behind Eggsy’s ear, fingers fanning across his head and neck. He placed his other hand low on Eggsy’s throat, before sliding down his still bare chest, across his abdomen and around the to small of his back. Merlin could feel Eggsy’s pulse jump, his breath stutter, the slow, languid relaxation of his muscles under his hands.

Merlin moved closer, pulling their bodies flush and tipping Eggsy’s face up, leant forward and placed the softest, chastest of kisses on his left cheek, his chin, his right cheek. Slid a slow, lingering kiss to his forehead, brief press of lips against his nose and then a small nips of teeth, swipe of the tip of the tongue, nibble again against his full lower lip and then he sat, mouth slightly parted a hair's breadth from Eggsy until Eggsy loosed the smallest, whimpered plea. Merlin murmured assent as he finally allowed himself to fully kiss Eggsy. Mouths hot against each other, tongues tasted and teeth gently bit, Eggsy was allowed to push forward but it was only so Merlin had a gauge of how much he could take back, licking into Eggsy’s mouth as if he could taste the humming moans and sighs, hips pressing forward against all that muscled warmth, reveling in Eggsy slowly giving all control to him.

Merlin broke the kiss to guide them to one of the chairs they were in earlier, sitting Eggsy crossways on his lap, he rested his head on Eggsy’s shoulder and ran a hand up and down his back feeling Eggsy relax further and further. “Give an old man a moment to catch his breath, boyo.”

“You're hardly old, Murray, and I'll give you all the moments you need.” Eggsy mumbled.

“I'd very much like to pick that back up at home tonight, after Mouse is in bed.”

“‘Member, only if she's okay wif it, going home that is, she ain't to be knowing about the rest, not detailed like she won’t but that there’s an us, if there’s an us she can know, and I want that even if she's not okay going to yours. I just...Merlin, _I want_.”

“Shhhhh...I've got ye. Can we talk with you here, or d’ye need your own chair?”

“Don't wanna move, but I'll not pay attention otherwise.” Eggsy leaned in for another deep kiss before standing, stretching and flopping in his chair. “Alright, I don't even know where to start?”

“What do ye need to know the most, before we figure out of your girl and my girl get along?”

“I guess, is Elspeth really your aunt and Ophelia really your cousin’s kid, or is there some strange scandalous call them a diff’rent title to avoid rumors thing going on?”

“Boyo, you watched too many soaps while she was napping and you weren't at work, I think. My family was never so proper that we cared about speculation. Grandpa Murray was a big man who did whatever his wife told him. He opened a petrol station and garage because she wanted to work on cars and she taught him everything she knew. They rented the apartment over the top to anyone who needed it, didn't care why iffen they were good people. Gramma died before I was born, but they way she's described, Elspeth is her spit and image, and Ewan, my da, looked like grampa but was so full of anger and rage he was kicked out as soon as he was old enough to not be their responsibility..

Elspeth in turn finished school, got a job as a shop girl for a fabric store, met Andrew, who brought her into _our_ shop, worked into the Manor, met a Knight, lost him, had Donal and grampa and gramma moved into the apartment, gave her the house. Said she was more than able to care for herself and her boy. The assumption is that he was her Knight’s son, although I could be totally wrong.

Gramma cut herself bad working on a truck, never told no one, infection in the blood took her, grampa kept running the garage. Ewan ran away when gramma died, met a girl at a bar, took her home, had me, they decided they'd rather drink and fight than be parents. That's how Elspeth got me. The Arthur prior to Chester was a good man, kept tabs on the families of his employees iffen they asked. She knew it was coming, I guess, and was prepared. Grampa told me before he passed that he regretted not takin’ action, but a man can't be expected to turn against his own bairn. It was Grampa taught me about knives, though I never asked how or where he learned, he just wanted to ensure I was protected.

Donal was about six years older than I, and such a serious boy. He went away for school, I stayed by Elspeth. He met Ophelia's mum when they were in college, I met Michael and Kim, Elliot and Harry. Some when I was mentored by the previous Merlin, brought in as his bugger-off to Chester, as Merlin picks the succession of Merlin, that is always, will always, be outside the Table’s control. The rest as they came in for their trials. I was introduced to some men who shared my proclivities, but I never settled down. Donal and his wife died in a perfectly mundane, perfectly ordinary car accident on a rainy night. Lost traction, gained a lorry. I was babysitting Ophelia. Volunteered to watch this overactive, loud, excitable, escape artist of a toddler. You never saw a child get nekkid so fast, and out the door. I figured her parents deserved a quiet date night. Been wonderin’ for some twenty-odd years if they'd have taken a different route and been fine if she were with, or if Elspeth and I woulda lost them all.

Grampa passed shortly thereafter, he was just _old_. We sold the station and invested all the funds for Ophelia, just in case she didn't work with us, needed her provided for. She was basically raised on grounds, either down in the offices or in the gym and range. I taught her all the knife skills, and she can dismember a body better than anyone we have here. Elliot taught her to fence and swing any long blade. Kim would tell her stories and taught her how to read people like books, and that girl had the biggest crush on David first, then Amelia when each of them passed training. He just knew her as the strange girl who cleared the range. She never spoke to him, but he nary had to pick up a shell after practice. Amelia knew, and took her to lunch one day, after which they were good friends and Ophelia seemed to back off. She's always called me uncle, it made more sense to her than any sort of cousin and if Elspeth was my auntie, and her gramma, I grew up with her poppa, I must be an uncle. Her insistence on using our working names is her being a little shit, and wanting a designation of her own, something I told her wouldn't happen unless she was officially on payroll.

So, there's the brief overview of how the Murray clan came to have such a presence here, how Elspeth raised me right into it, and why we will say screw moving a mountain to help you, we will blow the fucker right up.” Merlin downed his tea, poured another mug and downed that too.

“I don't even know what to say right now.”

“Well, why don't we see how our girls got along, and then you can tell me to take you home.”

 


	8. Hush Little Baby...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> our poor, brave, boyo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still unbeta'd and not Brit-picked. So, all that angst and bad I've been alluding to, and outright warning of? We see some of it here. This isn't a pretty, happy go lucky chapter. This isn't a nice chapter. This is, however a necessary chapter, and harldy the worst of what is to come. There will still be plenty of fluff and snut and goodness, but there's also plenty more as this is hinting...I'm sorry
> 
> This alludes to a lot of dark and bad stuff. All things that have been tagged for I believe, but a heads up.

“I really appreciate this, it's beyond, mate” Eggsy said, balancing a sleeping Mouse on his hip, “I'll need all her pajamas and training pants from her dresser, don't want her to feel bad about accidents, still new to the potty, so many new houses...Murray grabbed her bunny from the conference, I've got stuff in my locker here for me, I'm not worried ‘bout that.”

“Nonsense, it's nothing for me to grab supplies from yours, I've got a key. Anyways, I agree with everyone else, with the limited information as to connections and motives Dean may have, and with Michelle at a minimum knowing where you live, obviously, and _that intern_ having access to certain records, you not going back right now is safest.” Roxy snipped.

“Why you sounding so mad Rox? I never imagined you’d have a problem with me and Merlin, so what is it?”

“You never _told_ me! All the times I've come to you with my problems and issues, the good and bad, frustration with dating, problems wrangling Harry, issues with my family and you never once went ‘oi, Rox! I'm watching my sister an awful lot, might be something going on.’”

“First, I ain't never said oi, Rox...okay, well hardly ever. Second, you had problems and issues, said so yourself. I don't see the problem in my takin’ care of my sister. I don't see the issue in providing. Third, wasn't gonna burden you with things that I was handling fine on my own.” Eggsy stated, holding Daisy a bit closer.

“And I'm not saying it's wrong to take care of your family, but surely you knew it was a problem when you essentially hid it! Eggsy, we are your friends, your coworkers, _we are your goddamn family of choice_ and I know I'm not the only one hurt you didn't reach out. I don't know why you're hellbent on protecting Michelle.”

“That's hilarious, it is. You think I'm protecting her? No! I'm fucking protecting me and Daisy! If I call services and say ‘hey, my drunk, drug using, abusive mum, who by the way is dating and likely working with a small time wannabe crime boss who's also drunk, a druggie and abusive, yeah that one? She abandoned my sister with me, whoops.’ If I did, they'd take Daisy. They'd question why I never reported anything, why I kept going back home if it was so bad, and when they found nothing on Dean or mum, _because there's nothing to find when you pay the cops_ , they would give Daisy back and I'd never see her again.

Or, and this is the one that keeps me up, I ask you all for help, and Dean and Michelle find out, and then you all start having ‘accidents’. And then I Daisy gets hurt or gets gone and I am alone anyways, because I. Am. Always. Alone. Let me say I am not loving either those options, Rox. You don't understand!”

“Then help me understand!”

“Hey, excuse me, pretty yet terrifying lady and Mordred, I'd like to just slide right on in here and grab the wee _Luchag_ iffen I may?” Ophelia asked where she had been standing, wide eyed and swiveling between the two. “She's had a big day for a little one, and I'd hate her to wake up to this.”

Eggsy looked ashamed he had been yelling. “Ophelia, this is Roxy Morton, Lancelot. She's my friend and an amazing knight and Arthur's right hand, and a royal pain in my arse. Lance, this is Ophelia Butcher, MurderMerida. She's, well it's a long story who she is, but she's terrifying, and I guess Mouse’s nanny and bodyguard?”

Ophelia took Roxy’s hand, bowed and placed a kiss on her knuckles. “Lancelot, always a pleasure to meet devastatingly gorgeous and lethal woman. Okay, give me the bairn, Mordred, I'll give ye ten minutes afore we need to go, put on your big boy pants and accept that yer friends love and want ye to do well, and they can't understand shite iffen ye don't pull yer head from betwixt yer arse cheeks and tell them. Lancelot, understand he's from a different place than you, lit’rally. Bullocks!”

“Careful not to wake her, and if it's more than twenty minutes I'll meet ya at Merlin's desk.” He said, sighing as he gently handed off Daisy and taking a moment to kiss her forehead and smooth back a few wisps that had escaped from her crown. “My backpack and her bunny are there already. Thinks he's being all stealth like sewing in trackers.”

Ophelia sighed, “ _Fifteen_ , then I'm sending the man myself, and he knows he ain't being stealth.” She snuggled Daisy close with one arm, smacked Eggsy with the other, than quietly stomped away.

“Wow, she's just...wow. You say nanny and bodyguard? Is it that serious? How did you find someone so fast? Does it mean she won't be coming in anymore, Mouse I mean, not Ophelia, although the she’s rather spectacular.” Roxy swiveled to watch Ophelia walk away before facing Eggsy again.

Eggsy grinned a little, ran his hand over the back of his neck. “I don't know how much is my story, really. Merlin trusts her, and Elspeth recommends her, and apparently she grew up spending time on site, so most the Knights other than us should know her. I'm going to ask that she and Daisy come on site with me the rest of this week, if possible. It's...there's just. A lot is changing for me right now. I want her close.

Rox, I'm terrified, you have no idea, and I know that's because I've not let you, but this? Everything that has happened in the last twelve hours? This is huge. This is not how life works. I'm not secretly a prince and I don't have a fairy godmother, and in the real world there isn't anyone who just sweeps in and makes it all better. But that's what Murray is doing and I'm afraid he's going to look at me and see this broken, sniveling, worthless boy who is a drain on everyone around him and a constant reminder of things left forgotten, and shuffle me aside when it's too much.”

“Jesus, Eggsy, you're shaking.”

“It'll pass. I'm just...I don't know how to explain it to you, without getting you involved in things you would rather not.”

“Shouldn't it be my call?”

“No...yes...I don't know.”

“I’m trying to not be furious with Harry right now, Eggsy. If he'd done something after your dad passed, if he didn't allow him to be blown up in the first place…”

“If, if, if! If I were put in foster, there's no guarantee I'd be any better off, and I _can_ guarantee it wouldn't have been much different had Da not died. You think Michelle only recently became a horrible mum? That the drinking and drugs started after Harry gave me that medal? Fuck no! It just meant she was more aware the passage of time. How many days before daddy came home on leave. How long until one of daddy's commanding officer’s wives checked in. Let make sure Eggsy is looking good for company.” Eggsy was almost growling, a sneer twisted his lips and his hands were clenched at his sides. “I did gymnastics because it was fun, and I was amazing and it kept me out the house. People tell me about how different she was when Da was around, but I don't rightly remember much of that, do I? Most the memories I have are when he was gone with the Marines, and when she would remind me of all the things we don't talk about when he's home. We don't talk about her friends who visit, only how good school and sports are, we don't talk about nights spent curled in the corner of my locked room because she drank too much and threw a bottle and told me it was all my fault, if I hadn't come around he'd have stayed, we don't talk about marks from anything other than the playground or the gym. After he died? Well then it was we don't talk to teachers about mummy going out, we don't complain when lunch was barely edible, we don't get in the way of mum’s menfolk.”

“Why did you go back? If it was that horrible, and you were _out,_ Eggsy, you pulled yourself out, why?” Roxy asked, wiping at her face.

“The reason I left the marines is because she fell pregnant and I wasn't going to allow Daisy to be raised with all that and worse. I couldn't. She may see drinking and yelling when she's there, but the drugs aren't where she finds ‘em, she's with me at least once a week when I'm home so I can make sure she's not being hurt, I can try and show her love and how family should be. I go back to that flat so often just to drop in and check...When I'm not home I make sure Jamal and Ryan and their mums stop in unannounced just enough to keep my girl safe. I'm terrified that one day Dean’s gonna decide her being his ain't important enough to keep her from being hurt. So many people see mum, the occasional bruise and screaming match and feel bad, but they don't do anything because they see Dean with bruises and scratches and they hear both sides of that fight.

Michelle plays the victim when she needs to,mand clams up when she needs to, and hardly no one knows that she's just as capable of causing damage as Dean, moreso because you're supposed to trust your mum.

Is that what you wanted? Does that fucking help you to understand what is going on and why I don't ask you for help? What are you gonna do? Put a target on your own back? Take me out and leave my girl at risk? I'm still not even certain I'll get to keep her this time, but I'm trusting Murray with everything, _everything,_ I have and am, and you want me to trust a little more of my personal life out to you and Harry, because let's look at the brilliant job he did ignoring it before, and Perc and Ger? They don't need this, I don't need them looking differently at me. Your David, he may understand, and Sacha does, but I just can't.”

Roxy reached out to touch Eggsy, only to have him recoil.

“Don't, just fucking don't, not right now.”

“I'm sorry, Eggsy, I didn't-”

“This is why I don't talk about it, I don't want pity, and no one ever thinks, or knows that to say, or do. I'm not any different, and it's not like that was even the worst of it. My god! There's a chance that Dean is actively behind trying to get to me and Daisy, that Michelle just up and left her daughter with her son because she can't give a fuck like a normal human being, and this is no different than last week, or three months ago. I am the exact same person who held your hair as you puked because you drank way too much after the last asshole your da tried to set you up with was just that, a pretentious asshole! I'm still just me, please Roxy, let me be just me, okay?”

“Shhhhhh, boyo, I'm behind ye, and I'm going to put my arms around your chest and shoulder, please let me.” Merlin spoke quietly behind Eggsy. Neither had heard him come down the hall, but Roxy was very thankful he was here. Eggsy looked tense enough to snap in two, eyes glassy with tears and breath erratic. As Merlin stepped behind him, held him, murmured soothing sounds, Eggsy almost melted. “You make me so proud with how brave and strong you are, every day, boyo. Let me take you home, let you give this weight up to me a while, okay?” Merlin waited until Eggsy gave a shaky nod of assent before he addressed Roxy. “Mizz Morton...Roxy lass, I know you didn't mean to upset him when he was already barely tethered. I know he's like a brother to you, were you allowed to choose, and that your misguided attempt to understand what is happening was just that, misguided but not malicious. That is the only reason I am going to reign in any personal anger I harbor right now at this situation I find in my hallways. He is exhausted, he is hurting, and I am taking him home. Tomorrow, if you can approach him with a civil tongue in your head then I'll babysit Harry over tea and let you to hash this out. Understood?”

“With all due respect Merlin, we are adults and I think-”

“Nae, lass. You thinking and making presumptions is what caused this breakdown right here. I adore you, and I willingly give you all the respect you deserve as a knight, and as Harry’s friend and Arthur’s handler, but this isn't about that. This is about my Eggsy and I'll nae let you upset him like this again. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm taking me boyo home where I can take care of him properly how I’d like, and return him here tomorrow in better condition.”

 


	9. Flashlight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ...eventual smut...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merlin was really angry. It was really hard to write anything other than Merlin being really angry, then Anarchycox had to evac and I started knitting Dinovengers for her kid, and then I had a migraine that lasted roughly a week, followed by an infection behind the iris. Merlin became far less mad over this time period, and far more...thirsty...as it were.  
> So, unbeta'd, not britpicked, angry Merlin to most definitely not angry Merlin...Enjoy!

Merlin was seething.

He was furious with Michelle, livid with Dean, he was angry at Harry and pissed off at Lee. Roxy was rubbing him the wrong way right now and if he could resurrect Chester just to kill him, he would. Gabriel was on his shit list still, all the people who turned a blind eye to Eggsy’s suffering were in line to be smote and Heaven help the person or persons who've let Daisy be harmed. He held his shit together rather admirably in front of Ophelia and Eggsy and Daisy the entire trip home, staying quiet on the train to not wake the bairn, holding her in the cab, gently relinquishing her to Eggsy for pyjammies and bed once they crossed the threshold. He could even smile a little, thinking on the discussion between three, arguably reasonable, adults over what sleeping clothes are called. Pajama just sounds so formal whereas pyjammies sounds soothing and comfortable. Ophelia, being a little shit, argues for jimjams, but that's undoubtedly Elspeth’s influence. Eggsy goes with jammies, or sometimes jammers...Merlin thinks he can win them over, he just needs to sway his Mouse.

Once Daisy had been tucked in, Ophelia made a break for it muttering about she knew her place, it was nae in the middle of an existential crisis, she wasn't actually daft, and she was to be up pre-child. Eggsy disappeared in the flat, telling Merlin he didn't want to be a bother right now, but said he'd maybe make a late meal. He didn't want to be a bother. Fucking hell! Merlin practically demanded that he and Daisy stay with him, spent the day setting the world on fire just to ensure their safety and comfort, finally, _finally,_ got to taste and touch and hold and kiss...and he thinks he is a bother.

How dare they? _How dare they?!_ How dare anyone make Eggsy, sweet, talented, brave, self-sacrificing lad he is, feel like a nuisance or a bother. Merlin knew, to his bones, that he hadn't even begun to scratch the surface of what life had actually been like for Eggsy, that there was still so much more hidden hurt and misplaced guilt. He knew that he was going to do everything in his power to make it right for Eggsy, to try and show his worth to those around him. If he can manage to inflict maximum damage on those who've hurt his boyo, all the better. Anguish can be doled out without ever having to lay a hand on someone, but a well placed thin blade to a nerve, well, that's a permanent pain, a reminder of what they've done. Merlin new some would frown at his...aggression...but he's yet to meet a Kingsman who would object. Well, not too strenuously anyways. There's a difference between revenge and repayment, after all. Kingsman don't get revenge, but they always settle their debts, be it one they owe, or one perceived as owing to them. There is no doubt that Eggsy is owed a great deal by many in his life, and if Merlin has to raze the entirety of Dean and Michelle’s stomping ground to ensure that happens? He will do so with a smirk on his face, well pressed clothing on his person, and a clipboard in his hand.

He closed his eyes and sighed. One step at a time. First to make sure that Eggsy will, eventually, be alright, because he certainly isn’t right now, regardless of what he would say. Then to see how involved in this he wants Merlin to be. Then to figure out not getting caught if Eggsy says to butt out, because honestly? He is going to end them. It’s just a question of when, and how, and if he will show a lick of mercy. Cocking his head towards the kitchen, Merlin thought he heard singing over the sizzle of something frying. Cautiously, quietly, he crept down the hall, back to the wall opposite the kitchen itself so he could see inside, and there was _his_ boyo, feet bare, loose shorts hanging from his hips, threadbare and worn undershirt riding up his abdomen. Occasionally, Eggsy would turn from the stove and execute a small dance move before turning back to whatever he was cooking.

“ _When tomorrow comes_

_I'll be on my own_

_Feeling frightened of_

_The things that I don't know_

_When tomorrow comes_

_Tomorrow comes_

_Tomorrow comes_

_And though the road is long_

_I look up to the sky_

_And in the dark I found,_

_I lost hope that I won't fly_

_And I sing along, I sing along_

_And I sing along_

_I got all I need when I got you and I_

_I look around me, and see a sweet life_

_I'm stuck in the dark but you're my flashlight_

_You're getting me, getting me through the night”_

“Eggsy lad, is that...that’s the song from the _Pitch Perfect_ sequal, innit?”

Eggsy flailed a little, a blush spreading up his neck to his ears. “Well, yeah but its a good song, and...You’ve seen the movie! That’s how you know it!”

“Hmmmm...so, since we aren't going to talk about why I know that, what’re you cooking?”

“Bacon, just figured a simple sandwhich before bed. It’s soothing, yeah?”

Merlin stepped closer, looking in the pan before reaching around Eggsy and turning the range off, herding him towards the counter and caging him between the butcherblock and his body. “I need you to be honest, and there’s no repercussion either way you answer, but Eggsy, laddie, _boyo_...I told you more thn once today that we had a fair bit o’discussion to do later. The way I’m looking at it is thusly: now is later, and you can sit across the table from me, and we can use our words, like civilised adults, and discuss over sandwiches that you want me and I want you, and that work could make it awkward but not really, and that there is still a lot that we need to work out about what we both want, and what we both _need_ , and we could herm and haw over the nitti gritty...we could do that, or we could accept that we are both fully grown men, and that yes, we do have things to work out in a relationship but it’s not going to chnge the fact that we _are_ going to be in a relationship and that there will be plenty of time for talking, and eating, and being civilised after I drop to me knees in front of you right here, right now, and suck your cock. Because the bacon isn’t going anywhere, and because it will ease some stress for you, and most importantly, and I need you to understand this, because I want to. I want to take care of you, and give you what you need, and have you give me what I need, and I think right now we both need you to be so far down my throat people are going to _hear_ it tomorrow. So, what say ye?”

Eggsy gulped, “...the second?”

“Are you sure, that sounded like a question, not an answer.”

“No, I’m sure, Murray, the second option, please.”

Merlin nodded and made a noise that could have been a yes, or a sigh, as he lowered himself to the floor tugging Eggsy’s shorts and pants down, “Look at me, boyo,” Merlin said, waiting until he had Eggsy’s eye contact before placing one hand at his hip and slowly leaning forward to kiss the small scars that littered his lower abdomen and illiac crest.”Don’t know how you got most of these, doubt I’ll like it, but I love them because they’re you.” That being said, Merlin leant in and ran just the tip of his tongue around the glans, ran his fingertips not holding Eggsy’s hip up Eggsy’s thigh, just barely brushing his balls and the underside of his shaft. Another small lick and a heavy exhale, still watching Eggsy intently, the way he’d constract his abdominals every time he thought Merlin was finally going to take him in, eyes growing darker as breathing became more and more ragged, the slight whimpers. Merlin kept his lips parted as he slowly worked Eggsy further back on his tongue until finally Eggsy reached down and put a hand on Merlin’s head.

“For fuck’s sake what did I do? Yer killing me wif this, Mur, please-”

Merlin sucked, sliding along Eggsy’s length, tongue rolling and licking, slowly lowering himself til he was sitting thighs to calves and tipping his head back, fingers that were before only teasing now rolling Eggsy’s testicles and reaching back to stroke his perineum, breathing through his nose and swallowing forcing his throat to relaxenough to fit all of Eggsy’s length into him. Constricting around him working his tongue, the hip under his hand was trembling and jerking, and even though tears were springing to his eyes he could clearly see Eggsy’s face, jaw alternating between slack while gasping heaving breaths and clenched while whining, Eggsy’s hand sitting on his head, never guiding, never forcing, just connected, the feel of Eggsy’s toes curling against the tule under his knee. Merlin hummed, content to see Eggsy coming undone like this, the vibration from the hum being too much and when Eggsy frantically tapped Merlin’s head, he just grabbed his hip harder, pulled back enough to easily swallow, and stared as Eggsy came undone. Gasping and shuddering and head tipping so far back it’s a minor miracle it didn’t fall off before snapping forward.

Merlin scooched back before standing up, only for Eggsy to slither to the floor. “Okay there?”

“Hrmphhermmmhmm” Was Eggsy’s eloquent reply.

“Alright then, boyo. You took that very well, I’m pleased. I’ll get us some beers and get the meat and bread and spread at the table, you join me when you can and we’ll have our serious adult discussion, okay?” Merlin lbent down and kissed Eggsy’s forehead before reaching over to grab the bacon pan, and head to the table.

He will feed his boyo, and they’ll talk, and tomorrow, well, Tomorrow he gets down to business.


	10. You're the whole world and you barely know so....

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poor Eggsy exposition, sort of, and breakthrough, sort of, and Sacha is awesome

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Most of what I had planned for this chapter isn't here. Because this chapter had different ideas, ideas that I ran with. It is a different tone than most of what came before, and likely a lot of what will come after, but it needed saying.
> 
> This isn't an easy read. Eggsy's head is not a comfortable place, and it is dark and lonely and afraid.

Eggsy sat at a table on the terrace, watching Sacha explain to their crew the intricacies of building a child's jungle gym to spec. Fingers curled around a mug of tea, it was easier to focus on people being browbeat into laying down _more cushion not less_ , than it was to think about Murray, Daisy, Michelle and Dean. After the absolutely amazing oral sex last night, he and Merlin talked, at length. Merlin had a way of getting him to admit things, volunteer things, that he normally would never speak to someone about if it could at all be avoided. How long was Michelle abusive for (he doesn't remember it any other way), was it ever sexual (no, thank god), what about Dean? (What about him?) Were his concerns for Daisy skewed more towards the emotional and psychological, physical, or…(he knows she's been swatted; he's seen the way Dean and his thugs have looked at her, but they wouldn't be alive had the acted then, would they?)

He let Merlin ask about his relationships, if you could call them that. What was his sexuality, what was his romantic subtype, had he ever been in a relationship with a true and equitable power exchange? (He self identifies as gay, though he talks a good talk about ladies, and if it were a honeypot mission could perform, he's needed to in the past. What the fuck is a romantic subtype, and like, he thinks he likes being told what to do, but never anything formal like.) in return Murray volunteered that he is more attracted to people who are smart and powerful and competent than a specific gender, and Eggsy pushes all of his buttons. That in private, much like at work, he likes being trusted to know what is best and make those calls,but in private he gets off on it, knowing that his partner is deriving pleasure from bringing him pleasure and vice versa, that he wants Eggsy pliant and not only willing but _wanting_ to do whatever Merlin asks…

And then, then Eggsy was no longer sitting across the table, but instead on the floor, in the space between Merlin’s knees and he wrestled the man’s belt open and his trousers undone and was sucking at him through his boxer briefs and goddamn why was that so sexy and Merlin put his hand on the back of his neck and called him boyo and precious and sweet and when he came, still in his pants, the way he groaned _Eggsy_ sounded like a benediction. A blessing and a praising and a reverence of something so perfect and pure and sweet and good...and Eggsy just sat on the floor and started sobbing. Great heaving, gasping, shuddering ugly snot-filled sobs because he ain't ever never heard anyone say his name like that. Like he was something good, something worthwhile, something to value. And how do value someone like him? Someone with bruised knees from the lino, and a bruised soul from the get go. Ain't nothing pure or innocent or good ‘bout him, ain't nothin’ worth cherishing on the best day and he's far past that. The only good he has is sleeping in her jammies in a bed softer than anything she even knew before, and not nearly ignorant enough the harsh realities of this world.

Then Merlin was on the floor with him, _holding_ him, carding those wicked clever fingers through his hair and assuring him it's alright, and it's natural to have a large emotional release after a physical release, especially feeling safe for the first time in Gods only know. And Eggsy realized how much of that he had said aloud while crying. He allowed Merlin to help him stand, take him to the kitchen sink, wash his face the same way he would Mouse’s if she fell and skinned her knee, or after altogether too many nightmares...brought him upstairs, led him to bed, and started handing him clothes that smelt like Merlin, like comfort and already home.

“Okay boyo, time for you to get in yer pyjammies and I'll tuck up next to you and we can talk s’more, but the rest the night is just for that, talkin and holdin, then sleep. Anything else need to wait.”

“I think I'll be fine, dunno what happened-”

“Aye, that's part of why we wait. Not saying we never do that again, looking forward to it, but we need to get some things out first. If, at any point, I cross a line, or it gets to be too much, tell me ‘red’ and I'll drop,it. Otherwise I'll keep pushing.”

“Really? Gonna safe word a conversation?”

“Aye, and once we have a more personal set, ye can and should use it for whatever you need, whenever you need, betwixt us outside of a mission, unless it's prearranged. I dinnae care when I am doing to you, it is _always with your consent_ , and if a line is crossed, it stops, and we will talk about what was too much and why, and then we don't do it again unless you initiate. Clear?”

Eggsy just nodded, and once they were in the blankets, in the dark, words just fell out. Confusion over Merlin’s seeming adoration and fears about not knowing how to do this, and an underlying frustration that he will never be enough, not for Daisy and not for Murray and not for the Kingsman. That there had to be a grain of truth in the insults Michelle would hurl at him, in the curses and depredations uttered between smacks and scratches. If he were honestly innocent and good he would never have allowed Dean to beat, burn, cut on him...and Merlin sushed him, and rubbed up and down his arms, and curled around him again like he were something precious and needing protection, explained how no one actually would think that if they were decent, how he was made to think that, that he's a survivor and he did what he needed to stay alive, stay a given value of safe, protect Daisy. Merlin explained that his brain got turned around somewhere in thinking about himself, but they would work on getting him seeing clearly. Merlin kept coming back to if it would be Daisy, his Mouse’s fault, if she were to be treated like that and of course it isn't but he doesn't understand because Daisy, she's just a child and she actually is sweetness and light and everything right in the world, she ain't a thief or a thug or a worthless drain on him nor anyone else, and he will break the person who ever tried to tell her so…

And at some point, with Murray in his ear, explaining so sweet why his brain is telling him these lies, he fell asleep. He woke up to a knock on the door, and Ophelia sing-songs get that breakie was on the table, and a warm weight from the top of his head all the way to the bottom of his feet. He was using Merlin as a blanket, or Merlin was using him as a body pillow, either way it was warm, and it was nice, and it couldn't possibly be really real, because regardless what was said in the witching hours there ain't a way someone messed up as him could deserve this, but he's not good enough to let it go, either. He will grasp it tight as he can long as he can and hope that it's the right thing for him because it sure as hell is best for Daisy. He got up, Merlin following, giving him a look like he could read every thought that just passed his brain, and dressed quick before going to eat oatmeal with fruits in it, and drink coffee and tea and take the train in. Daisy was barely awake, and while she ate Ophelia did her hair. Explained they were coming to the Manor today but would be out of the way barring lunch or emergencies. Daisy said something that sounded like arrows, then fell asleep again, narrowly missing her cantaloupe.

That brings us roughly back here, fingers wrapped around a now cool mug of tea, Sacha’s team building a jungle gym...no,full on playground, for Daisy.

“Eggsy, sweetheart, it's been not even a day, tell me I don't need to find a way to hide a body somewhere.” Sacha spoke, sitting next to him.

“Wot?”

“Merlin, I had such hope when he brought you home last night that one or both of you finally removed your head from your sphincter, but I see now that you are sad. I cannot imagine a night of climbing that tree could leave you sad like this, and I am most certain that having said tree plant his roots could cause this, so explain?”

Eggsy stared a moment before laughing, “Thanks, love, I needed that. Your way with words...I'm sad, I guess, because I don't belong here, and he's gonna figure that out. I don't deserve any of this and I come from so far beneath you and I'm willing to admit I'll dig my nails in and hang on til ye wise up, and all of them drum me out.”

“Come again? Didn't you come in second to Roxy because you wouldn't shoot your dog, and didn't you and Merlin and Roxy save the world, and didn't you come in here a punk ass little shit and fight your way up the ranks alongside every posh little wanker who thought daddy’s money ensured them a slot? You are the one who made me reevaluate my courses, running them in the rain in the middle of the night in full kit, like it weren't nothing. You are the one who found a way to save everyone when the room flooded and you are the one who was tied to a train track and essentially told someone to go fuck their mother. How are you not worthy?”

“It's because I'm poor, Sacha, and I'm broken. I am a mental fucking charity case from the wrong part of the entire fucking universe! I'm here because of pity and fear that I'll spill the beans and after a while they got used to me.”

“That really what you think? Is it? Because I've been here longer than you, seen more than you, and oh, I'm sorry! Poor little trash pleb, thought he was the only one growing up broken, who had it bad cause he hadn't any money. Fucking hell, you think just because we were titled, or proper or had a mum and da and nanny that we were alright? You don't take this on, become a Kingsman, if you aren't bent at least a little, and being outright broken makes it a might bit easier. Not to mention the number of us that come from nothing. You fucking damn well listen right now. You. Inspire. The ones who came in working for me, for Michael, for Elspeth and Andrew? You think all of them have good upbringings? You think anyone who works in the manor doesn't know what you all do? You think I haven't killed, or I came from a perfect background? _Darling_ , do you really think that the upper crust was comfortable with an androgynous youth who refused to use a title because it would be attributed to gender at birth? Do you think Kim’s family was comfortable around him, always so quiet and observing? Have you ever talked to Marcus about his uncle….or even heard of the man? Harry before the injury was an obsessive twat who refused to listen out of spite and malice, your man is the best at hiding how unhinged he is until it's required to show it, and Ms Morton, your _friend_ , comes from so much class that it was easier for her family and their ilk to accept that the Lady Morton is ‘slumming it’ as a CEO’s secretary, one they all think she's using to sleep her way to the top, mind you, than to tell them anything else.

So, dear boy, tell me again how horrid it is that Merlin thinks you are worthwhile, that you achieved so much on your own, that your sister has us all wrapped around her little paws after a day, and all the best parts of her came from you. Go on. Convince me that we are all wrong about you, that you are actually awful, not worth this. I'll have my team stop working on the list of improvements you gave me, because you are obviously too stupid to know. I'll let the Royal Marines know they made a mistake recruiting you way back when, and I'll be the first person to get away with telling Merlin he is wrong, when he's so clearly right. More tea?”

“Well, when you put it like that...yes please, this one’s gone cold.”

“Good, get your mopey ass off my terrace, go to the kitchen and get it yourself. Then do what you need to in order to get your head on straight. If that means talking with the counseling team, do so, if that means cornering Merlin in a broom closet, do so, and if it means sneaking down to the range to watch Mouse with a bow that's practically bigger than she is, miss targets by a wide margin, then do so. Just know that I'm giving you three minutes leeway before I call Merlin and tell him you've finally stopped moping. That's assuming he isn't watching, that is.”

“Thanks, Sacha. You're the best.” Eggsy shouted over his shoulder as he ran into the manor.

“Damn straight I am. This place would fall apart without me.”


	11. The roof is on fire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry's ass, Merlin's sass and that accounting intern AGAIN???

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so amazed at the reception this has gotten, and I thank you so, so much.  
> I don't know why I try and do anything in any chapter other than just point the characters the direction I hope they are heading and let them go, as so rarely has a chapter happened exactly as planned.
> 
> There is much dialogue in this one, I hope it all is easy to follow. Again, no beta, no Brit to pick, just me and my brain.

“Cherry? Like a sweet cherry tart?”

“Did that bullet strip your sense of taste? Apricot tartlets will balance the oolong better than cherry.” Merlin sniped at Harry, “moreover, she didn't eat a single cherry from her trays yesterday.”

“I can't believe this is even a discussion you two are having right now!”

“My dear Roxy, you should know how important a proper tea party is. Apparently the nanny? Teacher? Small weapons trainer?” Harry questioned.

“Miss Butcher works, or any of those, they're accurate.”

“Thank you Merlin, anyways, Miss Butcher told Mouse that upon hitting anywhere on the target with an arrow five times, she will get a non-princess tea party. It seems, viewing the footage, that we will have ample time to plan, however. What would you prefer we discuss? There's no debriefs needed, no new missions at the moment, what is more important?”

“What is more important? Have you gone fucking bonkers? How about threats being left at the shop, on Eggsy’s door and his home phone? Michelle calling every number she has trying to find him and Daisy? He needs to know, we need to tell him what's going on!”

“Miz Morton, you need to watch your tone right now.” Merlin turned in his chair to face her, keeping his hands palm down on the table between them, keeping his tone level. “Last night was not a great night for him, or for the two of you. I may, logically, understand that you are one of his best friends, that you knew Mouse before any of us, and that you care for him. That being said, last night you made my lad very upset, and I doubt that was your intent, but-”

“But what, we aren't going to tell him something very important because-”

Merlin pounded the table and stood. “That is _enough!_ You will climb the fuck off of your high horse right this moment, _Lady Roxanne Morton_ and you will listen to me, and listen well. _We_ will nae tell him a goddamned thing. _I_ will tell him, once he comes to me. He had a trying goddamn night, and he is dealing with more in a twenty four hour period than any one person should. So yes, _we_ are not going to tell him something that you think is very important, because _I_ deem it is something he should hear from someone he trusts, and knows will keep him and his sister safe without making them feel stifled or pitied and right now I just don't think you fall in that category.

I will tell him, today in fact, that after a week of being God knows where and doing who knows what his mother is suddenly oh so concerned about the whereabouts of Daisy. Conveniently not until after someone with a connection to that amazingly persistent bit of smegma Dean is no longer able to keep tabs on him. I will tell him that yes, threats were made: against his person, about taking Daisy where he will never see her, and even towards his employers but ONLY when I can also assure him that it doesn't matter, because I... _we..._ do not blame him and it is not his fault and it is not a chore to keep them safe. Because he needs to know that. Because as far as he is concerned this is all his fault, _all of it_. And we _will not blame him._

I will tell him everything, as soon as he comes to me, because it is his right. Because I'll not hide things from him that directly pertain to him, and because it is the right thing to do. So tell me, lass, being he is doing his own thing right now, and seemingly fine, what should Harry and I be discussing other than Mouse’s tea? Should we discuss how you so utterly and totally missed the boat on talking to Eggsy last night? How you are so far up your own ass right now you failed to remember that good, nae, great people can come from the worst of beginnings? That not everyone is going to approach things how you would? A bit of your Chester was showing, dear.”

“I...I am sorry, Merlin. Forgive me.” Roxy said, after a moment.

“I'm not the one ye should be asking any sort of forgiveness or giving any apologies, but we all know that boy will accept it. Now, you've known her longer, apricot tartlets for a sweet but we still need a savory.” Merlin smoothed his trousers and straightened his sweater before sitting.

“Harry cannot eat anything with cilantro anymore, tastes like soap since being shot.”

“It's always tasted soapy, I just never said before. Honestly my taste is unchanged from before.”

“Yes, well, I'll run some of your food choices past Merlin later, and he and I can talk. I need to discuss some other things as well.” Roxy pushed up her glasses, made a point of tapping on her tablet.

“Ah, yes. It's important to keep an eye on things Roxanne. Do you know if the wee lass likes cucumber sandwiches? Tradition and all.” Merlin pulled up his clipboard and quickly cycled to his program that monitored Harry. In all the Eggsy excitement he didn't do his daily check yesterday, and what's the point of building an entire monitoring system into a cybernetic, prosthetic eye if you can't use it to keep tabs on your friend’s sleep patterns, moods, locations, and activities from day to day. Obviously it cannot tell him if Harry is actually alright, but it will provide baseline information, let him know what Harry is doing and when, and alert him to anything that was outside of the programmed normal parameters. Merlin has had to update it regularly to factor in new normals. Harry will nod off every few hours, he prefers his showers to be disturbingly long and bordering on so hot as to be dangerous. He routinely wakes up screaming apologies to people who he never knew and only saw long enough to brutally murder. That can be expected. But there are changes that happen to someone who is revived after being legally dead for three minutes. There are changes to someone when they have had a portion of their brain removed. There are changes that one undergoes after an especially traumatic event.

Those are the changes that he and Roxy are checking for. The program will note any fugue states, elevated heart rates at inappropriate times, and yes, it tracks what and when Harry eats, as they _are_ noticing changes, and changes that are more than just Harry no longer being polite. For all the Manners Maketh Man shite he spouts, Harry has always been an unbelievably rude and callous individual. It's one of the things Merlin has always adored about him, the way he elevated the art of passive aggression. But _this_ Harry Hart, the man who survived, now lives in a state of disinterested amusement, or cruel barbs. He has perfected the bumbling yet lovable director routine, and it works wonders with other agencies, but the Kingsman themselves, they know better.

Merlin is prepared to do whatever is necessary to protect those he loves. Harry went through a traumatic event, was shot, lost parts of his brain, an eye, was legally dead for at least three minutes in the ambulance, flatlined repeatedly on the table...well. Merlin is relieved to have his friend back. Merlin doesn't, however, trust medical science enough to leave his dear friend alone with Daisy. He barely trusts Harry alone with only Harry. He cannot control him through the eye, just monitor, there's a visual feed that records in a twelve hour loop and saves only if there's something outside the parameters. There's also gps. Unless Harry removed the eye, he could be found, immediately. If he was a threat to himself or others, he could be….minimized or neutralized quickly. Since Merlin spent the first few months worth of evenings after Harry’s return sitting up with him after nightmares, assuring him he wasn't a monster, promising if he were he would be stopped, spent his days during that time training Roxy, learning to trust her with one of the top ten precious things to him...yes, they would make sure everything was alright, and he would forgive Roxy for being obtuse in regards to Eggsy.

“She enjoys them, also smoked salmon. If I may though, why don't you leave the tea planning to Ophelia and I. We would likely have a better grasp of what a little girl would like to eat, no offense.”

“Aye, lass. I'd appreciate that, and ye are likely correct in that. Now, to get to the serious business, the threats against Kingsman and one of our own. I need eyes, but not ears, kept on Eggsy, we can put Amelia on that, and as I said previous, as soon as he comes to me I'll tell him. We don't need to know what he's talkin’ about just that he's safe on site. I trust Ophelia with Mouse, but if they are outside I want David as eyes up high. We need footage of Dean and Michelle for Geraint to analyze, so he can do his thing, anything with sound would be best. Percival is just about due for a rotation in the shop,bring him down and I'll see if he wants to start early or if we should leapfrog him with someone else, I know Andrew is more than capable, but I'd also rather not risk it.

I think, as much as I dread it, Bors and Tristan are going to be sent out to observe. If they're together, it's likely we’ll have bar brawls and possibly public indecency, but Tristan can generally keep Bors from exploding stuff and Bors is one of the only ones who can keep Tristan from disappearing people or things, or acquiring people or things. That being said, any information they can get will be appreciated, but neither Dean nor Michelle or anyone they'd immediately notice is to go missing yet.” Merlin glanced at Harry, who nodded.

“But...wouldn't it be easier to have them gone?” Roxy asked, still taking notes.

“Nae, Lancelot. Because that will make Mordred suing them for custody of Daisy that much harder. Ector has a JD in familial law. He is already making a case for Eggsy to have temporary guardianship based on Michelle abandoning Mouse with him, and a much larger, permanent request based on her safety, withholding affection, being in a consistently unsafe environment, generally exemplifying unfit mothers and so on. Simultaneous to this is a writ to terminate Dean’s parental rights altogether based on his being him. This needs to be done, signed, sealed, delivered before we obliterate them. I'll nae stand for anyone trying to take that child away. She deserves a better life.”

“I agree, Merlin. That being said, are you certain Eggsy would want this? What if, when you talk to him, he says it's too much?” Roxy set down her tablet and tentatively set a hand on Merlin’s arm. “Murray, I know it's not my place, I know I've kicked up so much in the last day, but this is making a huge decision about his life, _her_ life. What if he doesn't want this much responsibility?”

Harry cleared his throat, “If I may, it’s clear to anyone with a functional eye in their head that Murray will do it, if Eggsy cannot or willnot. He would keep the girl safer than anyone, never deny Eggsy time with her, and this way he gets a child without all that, what did he once call it? Aw yes, without all that ‘muddlesome vagina business’ I believe it was. Murray has always prefered the presence of a penis in his amourous interactions.”

“Thank you for your insight, Arthur. Don’t think I’m anywhere near not upset with you anymore either. I don’t care what you felt could have, should have, or would have been done, you _knew_ what sort of woman she was, and you did nothing. I just don’t have the energy right now to even parse why you didn’t, so, like dso much in our decades of friendship, I am going to ignore it until a better time.”

“That’s why we haven’t discussed your hatred of poor Mr Pickles, gone all these years.”

“That’s shite and ye know it! MY hatred of Mr Pickles comes from the hellhound pissing in my shoes. My shoes are not, have never not, been cheap, ye bloody ass, and he took every chance he good to ruin them. I had to resort to wearing canvas footwear. Ye made me look like a bloody preppy pretty boy in canvas shoes and no socks and fucking pegged jeans and I will never forgive your precious dead dog.”

“Wow….just, really, you are blaming an entire decade of poor fashion choices and not getting laid on my dog? Really? Maybe Mr Pickles wouldn’t have pissed in your esteemed footwear had you not told my dogwalker that I was only hiring her in hopes of getting in her pants!”

“Maybe I wouldn’t have told her that if she wasn’t young enough to have you arrested!”

“She was legal!”

“You answered the door in a towel, Harry! Arely a towel at that, it was almost a facecloth. I never needed to see that much of your skin and the poor dear was ill equipped. You set your dog on my shoes because I kept you from throwing down a barely legal teenager?”

“She could have been the love of my life! You don’t know!”

“What was her name then?”

“Pardon?”

“What was her name, if she was so bloody important I’ll find her for you and you can see iffen she’ll bed your wrinkly old man ass now!”

“Merlin, Harry-” Roxy tried to interrupt.

“Not now, lass, I need your boss to give me the name of the woman who was worth Italian leather loafers.”

“Roxy, take a note that my ass is not wrinkly, I am not wrinkly! I have smile lines and scars, but not wrinkles, and especially not my ass!”

“Gentlemen! I thought you should know that Eggsy is en route, and I refuse to take notes on your ass!”

“Rox, why can I hear you in the hall screaming about someone’s ass?” Eggsy leaned against the door frame.

“Because it is vitally important to ntional security to know that fearless leader’s ass isn’t wrinkled, obviouly.” Roxy drawled, rolling her eyes.

“Oooooookay then. Anyone want to explain why I”m being watched? Think I wouoldn’t have noticed? Or why there seem to be a few teams scrambling but there’s nothing going down?”

“Come in and have a seat, laddie. I was going to tell you soon as I saw ye, but I wanted to make sure that I was prepared as well as that you dind’t leave without knowing.” Merlin pulled the chair next to him out, and waited for Eggsy to get situated. “Sometime between when we left last night, when Roxanne went to you your flat, and everyone getting in this morning there were a few threatening notes and phone calls. To summarize, Dean isn’t happy that his daughter is in the wily clutches of percieved if not confirmed homosexuals, Michelle insists you kidnapped Daisy and are not fit to be around her due to your documented history with drugs and being a runaway and car thief. That fucking intern tacked on to Dean’s statement that we will pay for his medical bills, or we _will pay_. There was some minor honophobic vandalism to your front door and someone attempted to make a harassing call to Andrew this morning at the shop, that did not go over well. In an eggshell, that’s that.”

“Where are the notes?” Eggsy quietly asked.

“I believe, and correct me if I’m wrong, Lance and Arthur, that all evidence of threats against a Kingsman agent, employee or facility are preserved and documented with Ector’s team, in case they are needed for legal purposes, which works well, as we will press appropriate charges when needed.”

“Fuck a duck, Murray, how can you be so calm about this, they want to take Daisy and if I’m not there she ain’t safe.”

“Eggsy, sweetheart, I’m not calm. I will rain fire and brimstone on them as soon as I can do so without jeopardizing Mouse. I promised you, right? Not a game, not a passing thing. Ector is already working on getting you temporary guardianship based on many of the claims Michelle made against you, and we are going to get custody of that girl. I will not let anyone take her from you. If you don’t feel ready for that, I’ll take guardianship, or anyone else here you trust, if not me. But we are keeping her safe, keeping you safe. I swear it.

Once we don’t need Baker and Michelle anymore? Once I don’t have to worry about the courts deciding that in the absence of the child’s parents someone other than her brother would be better suited, I am going to burn those motherfuckers to the ground, do you understand me? There won’t be enough left to make a proper identification. I’m not going to allow them to live in the same world you are, and I’ll make them dissapear if I need to.”

Eggsy threw himself out of his chair and against Merlin, grasping at his shoulder and neck to drag him into a rough kiss, pulling back only long enough to mutter thank you and yes and too good for me.

“Roxy, maybe you and I should go and have some lunch now.” Harry said, slowly standing and heading towards the door, “And could you tell me where my trousers are? I don't think everyone else will be as good about me being in my dressing gown for meetings.”

“C’mon old man, I'll take care of you. After you get proper dressed out of your jammies, and we eat, would you rather practice hand to hand, or shooting?”

“My shooting still isn't back to par, pre incident. Let's start there. And maybe some Bolognase for lunch, thank you.”

“It's why I'm here, to keep you up to snuff, appropriately terrifying, and notate that your as is neither old nor wrinkled.” Roxy sighed as she shut the door behind them.


	12. All Around the Mullberry Bush...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which a lot gets moving, there's a traumatic yet hilarious injury, and Ferret Ass happens

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this took so long, it and I had an arguement. This is posted from my tablet so it has minimal formatting as far as italics, etc go. I'll edit later. The next chapter won't be a month and a half wait.

Ector sat across from Eggsy, palms laying flat on the pile of folders in front of him. Eggsy alternated between wiggling in his chair and repeatedly adjusting the knot in the necktie he was wearing. 

“You understand then, what I'm going to be filing? The first is just to grant temporary guardian status to you. That way you can legally make sure all her needs are seen to, if you need to leave the country with the child you may as long as you have an itinerary, or if you want to register her for classes and the like, you could sign off on that. After that is granted, we are filing to terminate Michelle and Dean’s rights altogether, and grant them to you, as I understand from Merlin that you are willing to take this step.”

“Yeah, yeah I'm golden with that, anything for my girl, right?”

“Alright, because you know he’ll do it if you aren't ready. In order to proceed and make this stick, especially in the light of how many of your….injuries...went undocumented, I'm going to need to know, under oath, what growing up was actually like for you.” Ector spoke slow and low, and Eggsy was reminded of the time he had to get Missus Munson’s poodle out from under the stairs, all soothing voice and soft hands, cannot frighten the cornered, scared dog.

“Once I tell you, Ector, is it out for anyone to find out about?”

“I'll not lie to ye. Yes and no. Some is private record, but most would be public for anyone who would care to look, as you're an adult. We would do our best to keep it quiet though, and anything directly involving Daisy would be redacted from public viewing.”

Eggsy twisted the tail of the tie he was wearing round and round his fingers. He thought about his childhood, his sister, his friends from the old bloc and his new chosen family. “We writing all this down or do you need a recorder, guv?”

\---  
Harry sat in one of the wingback chairs, leaning forward with his elbows on the armrest and his fingers steepled in front of his mouth, doing a piss-poor job of hiding his grin. Merlin stared at him, trying to look dignified and stoic; not like he was half dressed, skin sticking to the leather chair while one of the in house medics ran a line of stitches down the side of his leg, from about three inches above the bend of the knee to three inches below. 

“Are you going to tell me what happened, Merlin?” The medic asked.

“A chair broke. My leg was scratched, it was a smidge deeper than I thought.”

“You said that already, but I don't understand how this happened like it did. Your pants leg should have mitigated some of this damage, and the gash is deeper opposite of where a situation like that would call for. How did it break? Were you not sitting in it properly?” 

Harry smacked his hands over his mouth after a rather undignified snort escaped, his entire body shaking with laughter.

Merlin pursed his lips, “I dinnae see how that's really any matter.”

The medic looked up after knotting the final stitch, “I could make sure people know so they could avoid it in the future. My job here is hard enough without furniture malfunctions to deal with.”

“Hmmmmm, no, not saying. Trust that it'll likely never happen like that again, though I think we will upgrade to sturdier seats. Thank you, I know how to handle it from here, you’re dismissed.” Merlin spoke through gritted teeth.

The medic quickly gathered up his things before hurrying out of the room.

“Really Murray, I think you terrified the poor thing.”

“Shut up, Harry.”

\---  
Bors shifted as he took the pepper mill out of his jacket pocket, again. “Tris, you’re across a table, how you doing that, man?”

“You just aren't paying attention.”

“Naw I ain't, you're right. I'm trying to get a good angle on the mirror so I can read what that one dude is saying, Bully or Sharpei?”

“Rottie? I think you mean Rottie.”

“Yeah, that's it, slide me a napkin and pen, I want to write this down before I forget. He distinctly said an address and ‘The Boss’s floozy’ so I think he means Michelle.”

“Yes, logic would dictate. Good to see the explosions haven't scrambled your brain yet.”

“I know where you keep your suits, don't think I can't engineer something to make your clothes explode. Again. Wait, where did that pen go? I just fuckin’ had it!”

\---  
“How much do you need to know?” 

“I need to know all of it, Eggsy. It's up to you to tell the truth, I wasn't there, I don't know what happened, but I trust that even if it hurts you’ll do this for Daisy, even when you didn't for yourself.”

“Mind if I smoke then, you fekkin bastard?”

“I'll grab an ashtray, do you have plenty of cigarettes? No drinking though, I need you sober for it to count.”

“I don't generally drink much, and grab another pack, please.”

\---  
“Mouse, where did this mark come from?” Ophelia asked while toweling the girl off. Daisy had gotten so sweaty and covered with bits of hay after archery that a bath was needed. Ophelia promised that she could wear an undershirt like Eggsy’s vest, under an oversized tshirt and leggings that were in her diaper bag, it was the only way she agreed to the bath. Ophelia gently and slowly turned her so she was in more of the light. “Here, lift both arms way up high and I'll tuck the towel in around you, like a kilt ye can wear into battle!”

Daisy giggled, stretching her arms as high as she could,“Kay. Merida? Iffen I tell you, can't tell Eggsy. I don't want him mad.”

“Honey, I can promise that he won't be mad at you. I'll make sure, but I may need to tell him.” Ophelia squinted trying to tell herself that the round, puckered scar wasn't what she thought.

“MeanDean held his smokerette there. It hurt, really bad, and Mumchelle said Eggsy would be so mad and if I stay in my bed it wouldn't happen. But I got out of bed cause I wanted to potty and I was naughty to do it.”

“Babygirl, is there other things like this he maybe hasn't seen? Or other things ye haven't told him? He won't be mad at ye, I pinky swear promise, but I need to know.”

“That's the only thing MeanDean did Eggsy don't know.” Daisy said, looking at the ceiling and the tub and the floor.

“Lookit me, Mouse, pretty please. What about Mumchelle?” Ophelia gripped the towel and tried to stay calm at the way Daisy’s entire face crumpled. “Ye kin tell me, wee lass, I'll make sure ye’re always safe when you're brother isn't here, ye ken?”

\---   
“Tris, how very serious d’ya think baldie and the pirate were ‘bout me not blowing things up?”

“I presume it's on par with their desire for me not to kip anyone or anything, and pray they never hear you say baldie and the pirate.”

“I could claim my ears weren't turned up?”

“Merlin and Arthur gave our instructions in writing. You aren't to blow anything up, I'm not to steal anything important or make anyone gone. Plus ye’ve got those lime green aids that Merl made ya, ye wear ‘em when ye’re not working….is this g&t really strong.”

“What if, hypothetically, Tristan, Dean were sitting behind you at the bar now, and he called Mordred a ferret slut, and referred to what I can only guess is a great kid as The Sniveling Brat?”

“Bors, we know that Dean is an unfit father and miserable human being, that isn't a surprise but I really don't think he said ferret.”

“What else would he, oh that right bastard, once you plant a bug on him, wanna go shot for shot on Jaegermeister? I bet I kin drink your narrow ass under the table again.”

“Dear god! Why would you even ask? You know I will win!”

\---  
“You've told me enough about the time with Dean, before him too, but what about when Lee was still alive, but deployed?”

“The only difference is she wouldn't scratch my face or arms if he was going to be home soon, and when he was home, long as I didn't snitch I was fine. Da...he always tried to tell me it wasn't so bad, I had to be spinnin’ stories. Mum had it so ingrained in me that if I was just better, it wouldn't happen. So when Da passed, and she was drinking more, at least I knew to expect it, and when Dean started in...I got out, right? I was in the marines and doing good. Then she tells me she's up the duff and scared, she doesn't want to be to the babe like she was me.” Eggsy pauses long enough to drink a glass of water and light another cigarette. “She said she was gonna change but she needed my help. I left. Didn't even think. It wasn't even about her changing it was about me keeping that innocent baby safe. And I failed, I know it. Mouse ain't ever been safe, I know she won't tell me everything, I stopped smoking if she could see me because she flinches. I know that flinch, I do it myself. I was ten first time Michelle butt a cigarette on my leg.”

Ector was shaking.

\---  
“Let me get this straight. You broke my conference room having sex.”

“Nae, a single chair broke when I misjudged how close we were to the end of the table, and we fell on it.”

“While you were buggering him, against my conference table.”

“Harry, you really don't want me to answer that.”

“Did the table at least get cleaned?”

Merlin tilted his glass of scotch, and tried to think. Eggsy had come in and veritably launched himself at Merlin in his seat. Mouth hot, chest heaving, pressed against him from hips to chest. Obviously the room cleared out, there's no way Merlin would have allowed it to progress otherwise. He got his arms under Eggsy’s ass securely enough to stand and tip him back onto the table, leaning over him. 

“There's lube and condom in my pocket.” His boyo had said, so prepared. Merlin unbuttoned Eggsy’s shirt, guiding him to sit enough to take it off, but not enough to pull it out from under them. Merlin’s tie came off and ended up around Eggsy’s hands, Merlin’s pants were shucked and tossed...somewhere, and Eggsy’s were dropped until they tangled in his shoes.

“Are ye sure ye want this here, on the table and not home in a comfy bed, like I promised?”

“For fuck sake Murray I want that but later, just get inside me, please.”

Merlin slicked his fingers, grabbed Eggsy’s calf to hitch his legs up and worked him open as gently as his speed allowed. 

“Fuck, boyo, so warm and tight and mine. Gonna make ye feel it, no question ‘bout who ye be belonging to. Need to remember to talk later, same page but fuck, just...yeah.” Merlin leant forward to kiss Eggsy while sliding in another finger.

Merlin was certain the low keening whimper that Eggsy let loose will stick with him for the rest of his life as the best sound ever. Followed by the change in his breathing each time Merlin thrust his arm. 

He remembers Eggsy kicking a leg free of the tangle of pant and shoe. 

He remembers grabbing Eggsy’s thigh to guide his leg up against his chest, which is why he had his left arm off the table, while Eggsy was begging please, please, right there, so close and…

Yeah, that's when the shirt under Eggsy slid and they fell off the table and Eggsy landed on the chair, which broke it, and then Merlin landed on the jagged edge.

“Harry, I can assure you that no fluids were spilled and the table were, indeed, wiped clean. There wasn't...completion, as the accident fairly killed the mood.”

“Fair enough. Why was Eggsy wearing your tie when he left to meet with Ector.”

“To remind him what's waiting when he's done.”

“You are a perverted old sap.”

\---  
Ophelia knocked softly before opening the door, balancing a cried out Mouse against her shoulder. “Sorry to barge in Ector, Mordred, but I know ye be needin’ to know this.”

“Is she alright?” Eggsy asked, moving to collect Daisy from Ophelia, stopping when Ophelia shielded her for him.

“Nae, but she will be, we’ll see to it,” Ophelia quietly spoke. “Ector, ye have to take a statement and some pictures. Eggsy, I'm so sorry, she was so scared.”

Ector nodded, clenching the folders in his grip. Eggsy laid his arm across Ophelia, embracing her and his sister.

\--  
“Okay, which one of you two is on Bors duty?” Roxy asked after barging into the conference room. “And Murray, where are are your trousers?”

“It's your responsibility, so it's my responsibility.” Harry chirped, winking over his prosthetic and wiping at his face. “They were left explicit directions, in writing so Bors can't claim hearing loss or lack of his aids, though how he thinks we miss his non-mission bright green things?”

“I have jeans or trackies in my office, I'll be decent soon. What did Bors do this time?” 

“It sounds like it may have been Tris!”

\---  
“You’re gonna be in so much trouble!”

“Bors, stop.”

“Uh-uh, no, I'm not gonna. It's not my fault this time.” Bors singsonged, resting his head against the wall.

“Really don't think that in a cell is the best location to discuss this.”

“Mate, they've got you, on camera, with witnesses, dropping your pants and shouting that your ass ‘isn't a ferret ass, it's an equal opportunity ass’, not like you can deny it.”

Tristan bounced his head against the door. “I like the kid. His step-da is paranoid enough that I couldn't plant a bug without drawing suspicion, so I drew all the suspicion.”

“I count this as a win. If you weren't drunker than me, coulda done it smooth like.”

“Don't make me tell my sister on you.”

“I'll just sleep on your couch, anyways, Liam.”

“Bastard.”

“For serious, though, Tris...they not only hurt our Mordred, but a wee lil babby too. We are ending them, correct?”

“Actually,” Harry said, Roxy right behind attempting to look stern, “I have it on the highest authority that Ector, Percival and Merlin have requested to handle this up close and personally.”

“Oh shit. I don't suppose we can just stay in here until that's complete?”

“Sorry, Tristan, you da sent specific word that he wanted you to stay with your sister, as Bors will be busy and he’ll be working. At this point anyone who's been noticed is assumed to be checked out by Dean’s crew and we know he had at least one mole.” Roxy sighed, “That and you supposedly know The Goodbye Song, teach us?”


	13. Everybody hurts....sometimes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nightmares and revelations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a rough one, and if you have issues with nightmares or abuse, be careful.
> 
> I'm sorry.

He was curled in a ball, under his bed. The filched ice from the kitchen was wrapped in a corner of his thread worn blanket, soothing both the hurt of his fingers and the burn on his thigh. He could still hear her moving around in the entry, steps unsteady, keys clinking against the bottle in her hand.

If he could be quiet, she would forget about him and leave him alone in the house. If he had stayed quiet, he wouldn't have gotten hurt. He was a bad child, a reminder of everything she never wanted, a burden-good for nothing but a pension check, half of which went to feeding his sorry ass.

If he keeps his head down, he can grow up. If he grows up he can get out, get away, figure out something to make the world better, safer. He can be more than a burden, more than a pretty boy when he behaves, better than her. He can, he can, he can…

“Eggsy, sweetness, _Gary, laddie….boyo!”_

Eggsy woke up, gasping and crying, drenched in sweat, instinctively lashing out at the weight on the bed next to him, drawing back until he realized the large hand that caught his arm was gentle, uniquely calloused, not hurting just holding.

“Shhhhh, my boyo, easy now, and breathe slow.” Merlin murmured softly. ‘I've got ye, I'll always have ye as long as you're wanting. Daisy girl is safe, tucked in bed with Ophelia. We are at my home, and there ain't no one here who don't belong.”

Eggsy collapsed against Merlin’s chest, openly sobbing. “I wasn't bad, Daisy wasn't bad, why did she do it, Murray? Why did she let him do it? I shouldn't ever have left Daisy, gods I'm no better knowing what she did to me, let others do to me. Never again, Murray, please sir, never let it happen again.”

“Listen, sit still and calm your heart. I'll nae say I won't hurt ye, but I'll never do it intentionally unless you ask, and if it's an accident I'll make it right. You have so much good in you, dearheart, so much light that she couldn't hide no matter how hard she tried. Mouse is the best girl I know, and we will all fight to keep her safe. I know it wasn't easy, telling about what Michelle did, Dean and the others did. I know it was hard hearing what poor Daisy has dealt with but ye got her out, are showing her that she has family beyond you. Don't ever let yerself think you're doing wrong or did wrong by her.” Merlin pulled him closer, held him tighter, and let him cry. “There's my strong boyo, get it out, understand there'll be more, and that I'll still be here.”

“But...what if I'm on a mission and this happens?”

“Think yer the only one who has nightmares and terrors and flashbacks? We are so riddled with PTSD in this organization that I'm thinking they could name a new version after us, not to mention V-Day. Nay, laddie, we're all a bit cracked round here, most afore we even saw a suit, let alone wore one.”

“Yanno, I ain't ever seen ya in a suit. Button up and tie, sure. Any number of jumper, hell, even a Pilot’s uni once or twice, but never a proper bespoke.”

“Mebbe, iffen ye can be extra good for me, you'll get a peek, and if you are super good, I'll break out the kilts.”

“.......fuck me….”

“Not tonight, but I do owe ye a proper bedding without stitches or tables or interruptions. Being honest, I'm enjoying what we've got, and stitches aside, I'm plenty glad the table buggering didnae occur. Going to do you right and proper, ye ken?”

“Yessir.”

“Now, go back asleep, I'll protect ye, lamb.”

\----

There was a fierce pounding on the door, and Eggsy sat up so fast he fell out of bed.

“Eggsy? She's having a nightmare and I dinnae ken how to wake the lass!” Ophelia shouted, “She's like a riled up octopod and she won't wake up.”

“Door should be unlocked, decent enough for ye to bring her in, beds big enough for ye both to fit.” Murray said, rather quietly but apparently loud enough to be heard.

“I kicked the door, ye daft geezer, get up and open it fer us! Iffen I drop her, I'll yank the rest of yer hair right offen ye.”

“But damn, aren't you a right bunch when all sleepy and cranky like,” Eggsy grumbled as he got off the floor and opened the door. He reached out towards Ophelia, “and how’re you supposed to drop her if she won't let go? Ok, just lemme get my hands around her waist, then turn any direction.”

Ophelia turned to the right and Daisy went limp in Eggsy’s arms. “Now here's how this works, I'm going to snuggle Mouse and you and Murray can wrap around us however you'd like. I'm not shy, Murray’s in pants, and I don't believe you'll sleep a lick if you aren't with her.”

“He's right, Ophelia. Crawl on up, it'll be like when ye were wee, and your gran and I would keep you from crawling under the bed to fight the boogie-man.”

“The boogie didnae wanna fight me, Uncle, he ne’er shoulda been under the bed, now, should he?”

“Wait, hold up. There was a monster under your bed, and you wanted to fight him? Why not send Murray or Elspeth after him?” Eggsy whispered over Daisy, rubbing her back.

“It was my bed, it was my boogie, I was gonna get the prize for bestin’ him!”

“Uh? The only monsters around my bed were people, and fighting them didn't do much but bruise and make it worse, so I have no clue, but I think that's not how it works.”

“Damnation lass, just crawl next to Daisy and stop elbowing me!” Merlin whispered harsh as a whisper can be. “Auntie told her that if ever she thought there was a monster under her bed, she just had to threaten to go down there, fight it, and take the prize for besting a fearsome beastie in battle. Ophelia took Elspeth at her word, regularly could be found under _anyone's_ bed, snoring, and then getting grumpy the next morn as there was no prize to be found.”

Eggsy raised an eyebrow at Ophelia, and otherwise remained silent. She harrumphed, but grinned a little before laying down.

\---

Two cell phones clattered against each other while vibrating across the table, the message indication light on the monitor of Merlin's bedroom computer was blinking, and the doorbell was ringing.

“Wot. They cannae survive a day without the two of ye?” Ophelia stretched, yawned, looked around like she had no idea how she got in the bed.

“I've got Dais, and it's your flat, you get the door, I'll check my phone, we can go from there.” Eggsy said, ignoring his phone and snuffling at the top of Mouse’s head under the blanket. Merlin didn't think the two had moved at all during the night, Eggsy wrapped around his sister, Daisy clinging to her brother, hiding in his bulk. It broke his heart, but fueled a fire all at once.

“Comin’, comin’ keep yer damned pants on.” Merlin didn't bother with more than Eggsy’s vest and making sure his pajama pants were tied on his way to the door. Anyone willing to disturb him on a day he called off deserved whatever eyeful they got. “Seriously, what could be so-shite. Harry, Roxy, Ector…”

“Can we come in, Merlin?”

“I dinnae know. You here in official capacity as boss and lawyer, or here as friends and coworkers?”

“Both. Friends first, then lawyer and...witnesses I suppose?” Roxy spoke.

“Wait in the kitchen, I'll get him.”

“We need all of you, iffen we may,” Ector supplied, ‘and likely something to distract the little miss until it's time to go.”

“Go where? I'll nae let you take her from us. You know what I'm capable of.”

“Will you stand down, Murray! This is important, and you know we are all aware of the situation, now stop posturing, get your boy and bairn, and sit your ass at the table!” Harry snapped.

“Of course, I'm sorry.”

“Jaysus, you think you could be more subtle?” Eggsy asked, coming down in boxers and a blanket-cape, carrying a half awake Daisy and being trailed by a berobed and wild-haired Ophelia.

“Ok, everyone to the kitchen, someone pour juice for the lass, someone get the kettle on. And then we can talk.” Merlin directed.

“Not going to beat around the bush,” Ector pulled a large envelope and a few folders from his satchel, “Michelle turned up overnight, demanded the return of her child, and emergency custody hearings start in five hours. This isn't how we wanted it to play out at all, but I've got the crew out contacting people who will support Eggsy on the stand and getting as many negative character witnesses and reports on her as we can. They'll want to talk to Daisy, and it won't be easy or pretty.”

“How does something like this happen so fast?” Eggsy asked, wrapping the blankets back around Daisy.

“I’ve a theory, actually, especially as she tried to press kidnapping charges, too, but those were dropped the moment the neighbor said Michelle dropped Daisy off with you.” Ector said. “I think it's a set up. Let's look at the connections Gabriel had, we have no idea what information she had about what you actually do, but she knew you were dangerous to her lifestyle, you are becoming more stable and self reliant every day. It was only a matter of time until you made a move at Daisy on your own.”

“So, what's this all about then?” Merlin grumbled.

“We need Eggsy to testify about her character, what she did to him, to Daisy, what she let Dean and his lot do. I cannot force you to do it. If you want to keep things-”

“No, no...it's all going to come out. I would rather it be on my terms. Rather everyone not think I was chicken. And anyways, Daisy's but a wee one, so they can't release her information public record like, that is worth it, my being flayed like that.” Eggsy chewed his lip, looked everywhere but at anyone. “So….is, he uh, well.”

“No. Mr Baker will be unavailable. He is shortly to be detained by the constabulary due to a bit of...graffiti, I believe.” Roxy looked to Harry who turned away from staring at Daisy long enough to nod.

“And I suppose everyone will be there?”

“Harry, Roxy, myself as your attorney, Murray as your partner, Elspeth and Ophelia, Tristan, Perc, Bors, Sacha, David, honestly the list of volunteers is rather impressive, they want to support you. We have a few from your neighborhood who will be testifying as well.”

“I need to be pretty.” Daisy quietly spoke. Eggsy shuddered so hard he knocked his cup to the floor.

“No, Mouse, you needn't ever be pretty never.”

“Excuse me?” Roxy said, giving Eggsy an enquiring face.

Eggsy wrapped himself and his blanket cape back around Daisy, petting her hair. He whispered to her, before she buried her head further into his chest and they spoke in unison. “Nasty, naughty, ungrateful, ugly children are punished, but pretty, silent boys and girls are kept and given cuddles and kisses and special treats.”

“Dear god,” Harry whispered, grasping Murray’s shaking hand, “I would very much like to kill her.”

 

 

 


	14. I Fought The Law, pt 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who was that mysterious lady?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm grateful for everyone still reading this. I know that the updates have been laughably slow, and that's on me.  
> As always, no one really beta's this, though Anarchycox will occasionally read through things and let me know if its cohesive still, and tell me I need at least 600 more words before I can post. I love her.

The line of vehicles was impressive not only for its size but its variety. A Mini, a Jag, two Rolls, a few motorcycles, an honest to God 1970s wood paneled station wagon, and a few nondescript grey sedans. Seated throughout was most of the Kingsmen who had ever worked with Eggsy, the general consensus being if they don't get the ruling they like, they make it happen. Only a handful will actually go into the building, most just want him to know he's not alone and they are on standby if they are needed.

The station wagon is parked, everyone tense and quiet until in the middle of the backseat a small child in a simple, unexceptional grey dress with two rounded buns atop her head almost like mouse ears solemnly touches her face, her lap, and the two patch pockets sewn on the bib. “Speckles, textiles, Wallace and Grommet, God watches us and gives us strength.” 

Roxy cackles from the driver's seat, Eggsy almost chokes on his tea, and Merlin glares at Harry. “Really, Harold, you just couldn't stop yourself, could you.”

“Well, I very well didn't think she was watching, and I think I like her version better.”

“‘S’alright though, isn't it? We needed that before going in.” Eggsy took a deep breath, held it for a second, then started unbuckling Daisy. “Okay Mouse my girl, remember that while we are here, you may not be sitting with us, but you don't have to sit with Michelle, either. No one, ain't no one, taking you out this building without my say so. Miss Ophelia got special permissions to be one of your minders, but someone with Michelle’s team will be there too. Be respectful, be honest, and if anyone other than Ophelia or one of our people try to make you leave, be loud.”

Daisy scrunched up her face and nodded, “I unnerstand, Eggsy.” Ophelia came up from the car behind them and carefully picked her up from the car turning to head in when Merlin’s hand on her arm stopped her.

“Lass, you make me proud, every day. Ye’ve got a precious package today, anyone not known, trusted, or able to definitively prove they're the law try and separate you from her, I give full permission to curb stomp them. Ruthlessly. We make it through this in one piece, auntie gave me permission to take ye for your first tattoo.”

“‘M not gonna let a single hair be harmed. I've got tissue, crayons and paper, snacks and spare clothes in with the pull-ups, if they let us I've got the stories you recorded for me on MP3 for her to listen to, and ticked up in my knickers is a ceramic knife from gramma, so it gets past the detectors. I know iffen I can get one in, so can they. Love you, uncle Murray, me and yer team, we can and will keep her safe. You worry about him now. I've got this.”

Roxy took the lead, Ophelia with Daisy and Eggsy followed, Merlin and Harry took the back, and as they walked in they passed Bors, Tristan and his wife having a smoke on the steps, they could see Percival and Gawain helping Elspeth out her car, and Sacha was on the other side of the checkpoint. Their people had made an effective wall between Daisy and anyone not them, their people were there in almost overwhelming numbers, leading to questions about where _her_ people were. Because undoubtedly, she had them.

\---

“This isn't how we would normally do something like this.” The Magistrate spoke, “Normally we could sit in a small conference room, discuss what is best for the child, and go from there. However, it is my understanding that there is a potentiality for criminal charges to be filed against any number of the involved parties and allegations, potentially evidence and most definitely statements, will be received. That being the case, per the request of your attorneys and in agreement with Children’s Services, we have this spectacle.

Michelle Unwin-Baker, you are accusing your son of abducting his sister, Daisy Baker, Gary ‘Eggsy’ Unwin, you claim neglect and abuse, as well as abandonment. Michelle is asking that an order of protection be filed barring Gary from seeing his sister, Gary asks that parental rights be stripped from Michelle Unwin-Baker, Dean Baker, and temporary guardianship, as if this is granted it is my understanding that Murray O’Mhuirich will be seeking guardianship and custody on a permanent basis, is that correct?”

“Yessir, and thank you for being so understanding as to the combination of issues we are presenting, as well as the necessity for expedience.” Ector stated, organizing sheaves of papers and folders on his table.

“That sounds about right,” Michelle said, “I, unlike Eggsy, have no council, I didn’t feel it was needed. Dean won’t be here unless specifically requested as he felt in danger from my son’s companions.” 

“Noted, now, to proceed.” 

About two hours passed in which there were many basic facts given. Ages, locations, professions, a basic recitation of claims, potential charges, allegations, but no details. Ector had prepared Eggsy for this, but Michelle was becoming noticeably restless.

“Now that we have the basics down,” The Magistrate said, “I would like to take a half hour recess or so. During this time none of you are allowed contact with Daisy, but anything else is fine.Once we get back, I would like to go over any presented evidence to substantiate these claims, as well as having some questions for you all.”

Everyone filed out of the room, and Michelle immediately approached Eggsy. “Listen here you little shit, I don’t know what you are playing at, but I will not allow this to stand. Daisy is _my_ daughter, and what I do or not with her ain’t none of your concern. Obviously I wasn’t hard enough on you, growing up, otherwise I wouldn’t be seeing ya now running around with some magical team of Sugar-daddies now, would I? How many of them are you on your knees for to keep this job, huh? I thought I was bringing you up to be a good boy, and instead you wanna take my beautiful girl, you fucking bastard!”

Merlin and Ector immediately stood between Michelle and Eggsy, before Merlin spoke. “Ma’am, I would normally recommend that you hold a civil tongue in your head, but being you are too stupid a git to grasp that a place of the law isn’t an acceptable locale to approach anyone speaking like that, and being it will only help our case, please, by all means, continue to berate him and cast _mighty aspersions_ in front of all of these witnesses, _please_ , make my day that much easier, and I’ll make sure that the children you birthed will only ever need that much from you.”

“Was that a threat?”

“No, I am not one to make threats, Michelle. I just state facts.”

“If you’ll excuse us, we are going to take a moment, I’m sure we will see you back inside.” Ector said while steering Merlin and Eggsy the opposite direction of Michelle.

\---

Michelle was around the corner, having a smoke, when the smallest, grey-haired woman tottered up to her.

“‘Scuse, mum, ye have a light I could use?”

She dug around in a pocket before coming up with a lighter, almost dropping it when an iron hard hand circled her wrist.

“Listen to me, and listen to me well, ye petulant child. I know exactly what you’ve done to that girl and boy in there, and I know exactly who you _think_ you are, but let me tell you that you are nothing. I have scraped dog shite off of the bottom of my nephew and grandaughter’s shoes that had more standing with me than ever you will. Iff you want to go back in there, and try and lie about what you’ve done, what your man has done, that’s on no one’s head but yer own, if, on the other hand you want to go on there and speak to the magistrate, let him know that maybe you would like to have council after all, and that maybe you were too hasty and that maybe you could see your way clear to allowing that scared child to have a month with her brother while you and the sheep’s asshole you call a man get everything sorted before coming back...Mebbe ye do all that, and you’ll make it home, with no problem, secure that the daughter you birthed is with a foster who adores her, a brother who would die for her, and a nanny who would kill for her. Otherwise, you press this, you lose her anyways and you don’t see sunrise.

I’m not sayin’ that when we all come back here in a month, you will get to take her home. You won’t, but maybe my boys can all see clear to not dragging your dirty laundry out for everyone to see. Mebbe your council will explain to you that you cannot win. Maybe there are no accidents to you or Dean”

“I don’t know who you think you are, but when I go in there and tell the magistrate-”

“What? That a sweet little old lady threatened to have ye killed in your sleep if you persisted? Told you that you were nothing to her, and she would sleep just fine after having a mechanic cut your brake lines? He won’t believe you, and y’aint any proof. Foolish Child, it involves Eggsy and Daisy, they’ll play almost fair, all those men in there who love your son, in different ways, for different reasons. Hell, I’ll wager even the ones that don’t like him would defend him ‘gainst the likes of you. Me? I’m old, I’m square with my maker, and he won’t care none if I eliminate you and Dean. He’d see it as a great service, maybe, give me bigger wings and a shinier halo, even. You think on it, Michelle, and I’ll see you around.”

The woman let go of Michelle’s wrist and strode away, looking less small and far more fearsome.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We all know who the little old lady was, right?  
> What do we think Michelle is going to do?  
> Will Merlin be upset about this?


End file.
